Random Magus

Simplifying - not so simple

2011-07-14T20:53:00.004+04:00

I truly believe that when you need some change in your life and you want it desperately enough the entire universe helps you onto the path. I have been suffocating under the pile of too much stuff - from text books that are no longer needed to jeans that I don't fit into anymore, in the hope of wearing them when I lose the post-baby weight .

Getting rid of everything has always been so difficult for me - I am a hoarder. W hen we moved countries it took more than four weeks just to clear up the clutter even then it wasn't done. I have some of my school books in my moms house, books from when I was in grade 6. So it is a chronic condition. I don't want to pass this onto my kids. I want them to grow up with a clear mind which is uncluttered - because I believe gathering clutter is a mental condition a deep insecurity that if you throw something out you will need and you will be stranded if it isn't there anymore. But knowing the reason for something doesn't mean that you can fix it. But I am trying.

So when I came across the website of Raelee Pierce and it led me to the journey of less, I truly believe it was in answer to my private supplication to be able to have a clearer head - to be able to breathe through the clutter of thoughts [which I am convinced will lessen if I can get rid of my hoard]

The journey started because I had been finding myself constantly yelling at my little girl feeling anger as she hit her infant brother and sometimes even rage at what I perceived to be her uncontrollable behavior. And one day as I yelled at her and saw her face harden my heart stopped, I knew this was one of the most precious relationship of my life and I didnt want to ruin it. So I went on a desperate search on the internet for help [strange as I avoid self help books] But I knew I needed help and doing it online would be the easiest. I had a free phone call session with Raelee and then she sent me a brochure about a summer 7 week session which involved reading a book, I pondered, not knowing whether it would work for me, but then thought what the heck. So I signed up and it brought me the book

When I came to the chapter on simplifying - it was like the universe had give me a massive kick on the rear end to get up and just let go - let go of stuff - let go off insecurities, let go of the fear of being lacking....

Well it has been only a couple of days but I threw away all the countess dvds and cds which hadn't been touched for years and which had followed me from one country to another

Are we all voyuers??

2010-10-06T23:56:00.002+04:00

There has been this trend going in Facebook apparently started by women [which I seriously doubt] that women post answers in their status much like a meme, the question is known only to women.

It is an innocuous question with a provocative answer. It started with the bra colour question where women were supposed to write the colour of their bra. The question is sent in the inbox and you have to write the answer. How having everyone in your friends list and their grandmothers know the color of your bra helps breast cancer, I haven't been able to figure out.

For the latest one here is the message I received

Remember the game last year about what color bra you were wearing at the moment? The purpose was to increase awareness of October Breast Cancer Awareness month. It was a tremendous success and we had men wondering for days what was with the colors and it made it to the news. This year's game has to do with your handbag/purse, where we put our handbag the moment we get home for example "I like it on the couch", "I like it on the kitchen counter", "I like it on the dresser" well u get the idea. Just put your answer as your status with nothing more than that and cut n paste this message and forward to all your FB female friends to their inbox. The bra game made it to the news. Let's see how powerful we women really are!!! REMEMBER - DO NOT PUT YOUR ANSWER AS A REPLY TO THIS MESSAGE- PUT IT IN YOUR STATUS!!! PASS THIS TO ALL THE WOMAN YOU KNOW

And now women are putting down stuff like in on the couch etc. So it got me thinking that not only do we like to look in on the private aspects of other people's life but we want them to see ours, and then we put on an act and get outraged about infringement of privacy in our lives these days. I mean hello? why invite then get offended and accuse of trespassing?

So why do we do this? Is it to feel more attractive and desirable or is it a kosher way of advertising your femininity. Is it just the tease in us women. I fail to understand

What could this kind of status message have as its purpose other than to invite voyeurism and have others speculate especially men? Then to go on speaking about womens rights and feminism.

I think streakers are far more honest in their intentions - if you want attention have the bloody guts to be open about it and not hide behind stupid provocative Facebook statuses

2010-09-04T11:53:00.002+04:00

If we don't remember something does it mean it does not exist for us???!!
I have been wondering why we don't remember our early years of course I have met people who insist they remember things from when they were two but I take that with a pinch of salt.
Anyway why don't we remember?
Kids do have a memory so why don't we have a recall of that memory?

of dreams

2010-08-21T23:42:00.003+04:00

Dreams are like the shock absorbers of our mind they are the amniotic fluid that protects us - the brain defense against the monotonousness of everyday life. I love dreaming - my own mind shocks and stuns me and shows me a side of me that I didn't know I had.

Sometimes in my dreams I design the most beautiful houses, the most gorgeous clothes - I am a maker of beauty. I sometimes wonder if that capability is locked somewhere deep inside and I could unlock it with some fancy drug?

I sometimes like to think that we are actually two people one that functions when we are awake and the other rebellious twin that is locked up, and it waits for night to come out and play .

Or maybe they are both just as real but exist on different planes of times and space. Just the way when its night in some parts of the world and there is day in others - maybe our waking life is the dream of our dream self.

What I am trying to explain very badly is that when we are awake our other self is dreaming and our waking life is that dream and vice versa

Did that make it any sense?? Its kind of exciting when you think about it. Our dreaming selves meet people that we haven't!!

Just a thought

2010-08-14T00:30:00.003+04:00

You know as kids we all imagined that our toys came to life in the night, when we couldn't see them and had a life of their own. Especially if you read a lot of Enid Blyton, with tales of golliwogs and naughty dolls.

Well the other night lying in bed reading a particularly favorite author I thought how cool would it be if the characters in a book did the same. Imagine them all coming alive inside the book and living out the words. And how fabulous if we could get a chance to slip into the books as an onlooker or an extra in a movie set.

It really would be a dream come true - that's why I love dreams so much - because these things do happen in dreams especially if you have weird dream like me

PS: The book I was reading was 'Bloodsucking Fiends' by Christopher Moore

You are what you do...ain't that true

2010-07-27T13:02:00.005+04:00

Okay I apologize for the terrible rhyme, but it was irresistible. I have been doing a lot of thinking recently, after quite a long time it must be said, and I was thinking about what makes us who we are. In the past I used to think that our thoughts and intentions are a bigger part of that picture. But using myself as an example I have come to realize that the sum of all the actions you do in a day, not even a lifetime, just a day, build up to who who become. It is a constant evolution dictated by our daily actions so I might think I am a reader, or a thinker, or a writer but until I do those things regularly, my claim means nothing.
Just doing an action regularly slowly becomes part of who you are, what you think and your intentions are like fuel but no matter how much fuel you have in a car it will be useless until you turn on the ignition and actually drive.
So if you want to call yourself a charitable person just thinking good thoughts of others won't make you one you must be charitable on a regular basis.
If you want to become an artist pick up that brush and do something daily then you realize that most things that we want to be require discipline and dedication and a lot of effort and if we put that effort we will get there.
It is easy to hide behind insecurity of not being good enough but what we really lack is the hard work everyone wants it easy, the shortcut, the excuse of not being gifted naturally is the best example of not doing something because there is no easy way.
The only thing in my life that I have put in effort for is my daughter and I see the result of that in myself and can safely say that that when you do put in the immense hard work there is always an output that is tangible.
And similarly not doing something, you slowly chip away parts of yourself, we are not constant fixed being, parts can be taken away and added, we are a work in progress, as long as we put in the effort and constantly evaluate, weed out the unnecessary and cultivate whatever gives us our meaning, contentment naturally follows

2010-07-26T22:22:00.002+04:00

It feels so strange to write after such a long time - I had turned my back on writing and now it seems so difficult to turn back. Why was I so lazy and is anyone even interested in knowing?
I just felt I had nothing to say – my self totally submerged in being another person.
I was walking farther and farther away from myself getting totally absorbed and assimilated into being someone else – the mother, who only had thoughts about her child read books regarding only her, all hobbies all activities centered around her.
What time was left, after she slept, squandered away in mindless games, its as if I was running away from thinking or being more. It felt that the only thing I could do well was being a mom and was scared to try to be more, it felt like my natural vocation and became a carte blanche to be nothing else. It felt so safe to be what I instinctively knew how, to do the the first thing I was so good at without it taking massive amount of effort.
I woke up to the slow atrophy of my mind after reading someone else’s innocent remark. Changes that are personal can come from such impersonal sources.
I find that strangely hilarious.
Now it seems that I am back to trying to reclaim some of my old self without feeling guilty.
It was so scary to return to this page like a garden that you had ignored and was now filled with weeds, at the same time I feel excited as well at this tentative reclamation.
It becomes very easy to hide behind excuses, to rationalize why you are wasting away your mind why you are turning your back on growing forward, so easy and safe to lapse into mindlessness after a tiring day….
I feel so exposed right now, my fingers hesitating at the 'publish post' button. That is what writing does…. it brings the mirror forward

Yo Facebook!

2009-08-28T13:15:00.000+04:00

As you may or may not remember I was supposed to be doing my dissertation some time ago. But that didn't work out due to numerous reasons. And after Aleyna was born I sort of lost touch with any world but baby. Now that she is a bit older I have a little more time. So I have decided to venture out of our cocoon.
My new addiction seems to be gaming applications on Facebook so I thought why not combine work and pleasure. My topic is "the impact of Facebook on the changing face of advertising".
I would love your opinion on this and perhaps a little help in filling my questionnaire when I get it completed.
I will be presumptuous enough to thank you in advance

PS: For once I hope mixing work and pleasure pays off

Status updates in Facebook....

2009-08-16T00:06:00.006+04:00

One of the most fun things about Facebook leaving aside the voyeuristic aspect which is a necesary part of the process, are the status updates.

They are not only a barometer to measure the 'status' of the person in question [a mini blog in itself] but also lead to interesting conversations much like the comment threads in blogs.

Often times you can tell who is fighting with whom and the undertones of what is not said tells so much more. The passion with which some make declarations of love and hate, bitter remonstrations, public displays of affection and lifetime achievements or the dull drudge of daily life are all part and parcel of this wonderful vehicle.

In any case I am digressing as usual - this is one of my status update and following comments which lead me to thinking... I think maybe first you should read for yourself.

Amber Azam-Kureshi's reflecting... There can be no happiness without the courage to deconstruct... that's why I suppose there are not too many truly happy contented people around

Friend #1
"sometimes the deconstruction isnt in ure hands...so if u were to deconstruct maybe u would have done it differently????and hence it requires luck then anything else...."

Friend # 2
"well i have spent the last few years deconstructing.. so i warmly await happiness as my reward"

Friend #3
"Luck, fate, coincidences..are misconception of our times. Believing in the above will result in a life tossed and turned by its conditions. Aim for a life where you dictate your circumstances..We make our own destiny!

“Increase your selflessness to such heights that before creating each destiny, God himself will have to ask the human “What is your opinion about this”.

Each and every one of us has to deconstruct in our life time, some do it knowingly and others in ignorance.

Who says that we have to wait for happiness or, go through the deconstruction phase being unhappy? Accepting the good and the not soo good from the divine with gratitudet will generate this content/happiness... Believe me, God has a clear plan for us!
"God does not play dice" Albert Einstein

Amber Azam-Kureshi
"When I was talking about deconstruct there was a clear distinction between ‘destroy' and 'deconstruct' sometimes we have to methodically and brick by brick take care of the excess we have accumulated - whether it is in material goods or emotional hang ups or misconceptions about the routes to happiness or what the world thinks constitutes as right or wrong.Sometimes we have to take chance and risks to make drastic paradigm shifts only then do we find out that what we previously thought we couldn’t live without or die for, doesn’t have the importance we give it.
And clutter does come in the way of happiness".

I have been thinking about this conversation in the midst of nappy changes and food wars and have concluded that yes it is not merely semantic there is a clear distinction and that lies in the method and rationality involved. To destroy somehow implies to emotionally ransack its irrational and thoughtless whereas deconstruction would be very logical, cold and ruthless

Even the words echo their delivery!

PS: Doesn't the word destiny imply that it is not in your hands?????

hello

2009-08-09T10:21:00.004+04:00

Hi everybody, I have been the proverbial cry wolf, so won't even try to say that I am back. But was missing all the amazing people I have met during blogging so thought I'd stop and say hello. Part of the reason I have been so irregular is that all my day is spent with Aleyna and I hardly get time, when she goes to sleep there seems to be a whole other life to catch up on. But another part of the reason is that I feel that all words have dried up and I seem to only be able to talk about toddler menus and all things baby related - I must admit I have become totally one dimensional, I guess this is what happens after you have a baby. Even as I write Aleyna has managed to delete every word I wrote, thank God for the control z, button.

Being responsible for another human being is an awesome responsibility and an unbelievable pressure, you spent half of your time feeling guilty and the other feeling half quite proud of yourself. I honestly think us moms can be quite full of ourselves. I do this and this for my baby do you do it too? Everyone actually thinks they are the best parent and worst parent at different times.

Most other moms you meet are silently sizing up you and your tot and consciously and unconsciously you are doing the same. How much does she weigh, has she started walking? when did yours get her teeth and how many, do you feed her or has she learnt to self feed, etc etc. But somehow you don't mind being asked or asking. It is a club and you automatically belong. There is an openness and compassion, because each knows how tough it is to raise a little one and that you finally realize we all do the best that we can and that is all that matters. Doing the best you can.

Even if you have had problems fitting in with people all your life, or felt a square peg amidst round, a baby immediately standardizes and uniformizes you. Or at least that is what happened to me, and somehow where I once took pride in being 'different' now I don't mind being the same.

Is love unconditional?

2009-04-01T17:27:00.003+04:00

Is there such a thing? People say that a mother's love is unconditional or God's love is unconditional. Unconditional love meaning love that has no expectations, love that just gives without accepting anything in return.

I have had countless arguments with people when they say that there is such a thing as unconditional and used to be told to wait till I was a mother to experience this phenomenon.

Well, I waited but still haven't reached any such conclusion. I feel a love for Aleyna beyond anything I have ever felt for anyone but then she is such a joy to me. Her smile when she sees my face in the morning literally makes my heart melt. But I still can't say it's unconditional as she give me love in return. I live for the new things she does and how she's growing a bit everyday.

With unconditional love you are not supposed to expect anything from the person you love, keep giving even when you don't get anything in return. It's true that only a parent gives more than they receive and they want the best for their child before themselves. A parent's love might be as close to unconditional love as one can get but nonetheless there are conditions attached to it. There is always an expectation, expectation that you will be a 'good' child. Expectations that change with time and some that are unconscious.

Unconditional love is a myth. You may fool yourself into thinking that you are loving unconditionally and don't want anything in return but that's not the truth. Even if you convince yourself that your love is unconditional and that you don't want anything for yourself, it might be the fact that it makes you feel good about yourself to feel like you have boundless love that doesn't want anything in return. Conditions always exist, some that might not be apparent to even yourself.

When we say we love someone unconditionally we are saying that we love the person for just 'being' and not 'doing'. We are deserving of love by just being a creation of God, that is enough of a reason to have intrinsic value independant of our actions. I can't wrap by head around that.

Because God too has conditions attached to our behaviour, what are the ten commandments if not conditions?

2009-02-14T08:24:00.005+04:00

You hear people say how much life changes after having a baby but you realize the gravity and magnitude of that truth only after you've experienced it yourself. Its a momentous occasion truly but a lot of people have it before they are truly ready for it or understand its significance and the effects it necessarily has. Having a baby doesn't only mean having an adorable extension to your family it means a whole different dynamic taking place in your existence as a couple and you better be ready for it and have a strong marriage to sustain it as well as a strong sense of who you are.

In my case because of the long wait we were more than ready, there was already everything that we had done, the late nights and the parties were something that we didn't mind missing anymore. We already knew everything there is to know about each other and done everything from jumping out of the sky to partying all night. But even then it is difficult to maintain the balance between baby and hubby. I want to spend every waking minute with Aleyna to the exclusion of everyone and everything. I marvel at couples who have babies immediately after they get married - it certainly ain't easy. I have seen cases where after the initial excitement and whirlwind of the baby settles, the woman realizes that a huge change has taken place. She can't go out as much with her husband no more romantic candlelit dinners 'discovering' each other. A new marriage is in itself a challenge, where you have to learn to co exist with each other. You haven't laid grounds as a couple yet, not formed a foundation of your relationship to which you're adding another floor so to speak, thus the building isn't very strong to withstand the extra pressure. . The woman feels torn between looking after the baby, being with the husband or taking care of how she looks and ends up a mess. There is unspoken expectations to be super mom, super wife, superwoman and sometimes you lose the plot, add to that the extra pounds that don't necessarily make you look your best. The woman is not allowed to have a bad day or feel miserable, and unsure of herself or her new marriage because that is immediately categorized as being self indulgent and ungrateful of the miracle that is her baby. Talk about having too much on your plate.

But women make it through, I can only say that never in a million years could a man [correction 'most' men, there are always exceptions to the rule] have a baby and I'm not talking about the physical impossibility.....

Where am I from, Mummy???

2009-02-05T15:20:00.004+04:00

Kids born in Dubai don't get a nationality only the Emirati or locals do. The nationality on their passport is the same as their parents. If both the parents are from different countries then I suppose the child would carry the fathers' country of origin. And what if even the parents were born in the UAE, what then? They'd end up borrowing their parents' nationality who in turned had borrowed their parents'. Wow!!!

The funny thing is that in UAE, the locals constitute only approximately 20%, the rest of the population is a mixed bag of Asians, Arab expats and others. Every day brings more people from all over the world to Dubai as they prepare to settle down with their families, or start ones, a lot of children are born here [the waters of Dubai seem to be very fertile, every fifth person you see is pregnant or carrying strollers]

So what should these kids do? They have to accept their parents nationality, but what if they don't have any associations or bonds with that country? They aren't born there, didn't go to school there, played in the parks there, they haven't made their friends there, had their fights, yet their passport says they belong to that country.

This got me thinking about what makes a person belong to a country? Especially in the case of the country not accepting the fact that the person was born there and for all intents and purposes its their only true home?

When I had this conversation with an acquaintance they gave their own explanation, 'whichever country your forefathers have migrated too, and adopted as their own, should determine your nationality'

But then where do you decide to stop and choose, your great grandfather's country or his fathers'?.

Would such kids be different when they grow up? Especially if they are of a questioning nature or will they just adopt their parents nationality, the one given on their passport even though they weren't born there and in some cases have just been there on holidays? Is it even fair to expect them to accept that country as their own if they haven't grown up there. Most of them just end up convincing themselves that indeed they are from where their parents are.

But nationality and culture are two different things you might be an Asian because of ethnicity but nationality?

Does having roots only depend on what your passport says or growing up in a place is what determines nationality????

Not dead... infact just multiplied [7 months ago]

2009-02-01T16:30:00.003+04:00

Hi everyone and happy holidays. I know this is after a REALLY long time more than a year 15 months to be precise but I was busy :-)

Had a beautiful baby girl last year June.

Meet Aleyna

At birth ---------- - now

I used to hear everyone says life changes after a baby but never knew how much!

It's awesome but I literally don't do anything but be with her - slightly obsessive but she came after 9 years and is my little miracle!

...the means to Meaning!!!

2008-01-11T23:40:00.000+04:00

I have a crazy infatuation with words and can be very easily fooled by people who can use them well, my love for beautifully strung together words has been expressed quite extensively in earlier posts.

But sometimes the most wondrous moments in life transpire without any words at all and the effect of that wordless communication is so much more powerful. Sometimes so many things that are so difficult to express, because what you feel is so much bigger than words, can be said through a single glance. When emotions are perfectly in sync, words pale - and that's when you realize the truth behind the cliche, 'a picture is worth a thousand words' .

That moment and your experience of it makes you realize that words are nothing without meaning and that meaning is not dependent on words at all. They are there to convey the essence and if that's not there the most immaculately put together words will have no effect.

'Words offer the means to meaning...'
and without that meaning words are merely 'empty vessels'!

Ode to Belief

2008-01-04T14:05:00.000+04:00

These days more so than ever my mind keeps dwelling on how brave people who don’t believe in God, really are. For if I didn’t believe I would find it so hard to find strength.

For me to believe in God and for that belief to be rational to myself I don’t need to back it up with any argument – it simply exists and if I were to try to negate it, it would still be.

When I’m scared, it is comforting to pray and leave it to an entity, which I believe to be much bigger than myself. Believing in God is the ultimate selfish act – it gives me much more than it does to God.

Believing in something is what gives most of us some meaning. There has to be something we believe in whether it is knowledge, truth or beauty or being right.

Everyone does need that belief – for with that system, some principles are born which give form to the life that exists in our head.

For me that belief is my belief in the existence of God, I choose to believe, not because I was taught to, as there are certain rituals of organized religion which I don’t follow at all, but because I just do, I don’t have an option even if I tried not to believe it wouldn’t happen. Only someone who believes can tell you the sweet release of letting go and leaving it to God with the prayer to accept with strength whatever outcome ensues, an outcome over which nobody whether they believe or don’t believe, have any control. You can only control the way you feel and that’s what you pray for.

I don’t care if it is the more unsustainable or complicated hypothesis to choose.

Let me explain…

William of Ockham says that when you are presented with two hypotheses that are otherwise equally well-supported by the available evidence, you should always pick the simpler hypothesis. This principle is known as Ockham’s razor.

For example, these are the two hypotheses

1. There exist aliens amongst us but they can choose to be invisible and immaterial to escape detection by humans

2. There exist no aliens

Both can appear to be correct if we measure their accuracy according to their descriptions. The rational thing, people will point out, is to believe that no aliens exist – it is simpler.

But like I said earlier, faith does not require a good argument to justify its existence. It is unexplainable.

I suppose this battle will wage on for as long as the universe exist with both sides believing in how absolutely false the other is. Arguments will be presented by generations to come, questions such as why God allows there to be suffering and why does cancer exist, why does punishment seem to be so unfair why do cruel people prosper and the good ones have horrible things happen to them will always exist.

But what people don’t realize is that when you believe, you believe unconditionally it is very much like the love a mother feels for her newborn baby who keeps her up all night and demands the world. It is all encompassing and has no argument for its existence, it just is.

Would you rather be Happy or Right??

2007-12-23T00:13:00.000+04:00

I WOULD RATHER BE HAPPY THAN RIGHT…

...THE THING IS…

...I DON’T THINK I CAN BE HAPPY WITHOUT BEING RIGHT ;-D

....and you???

Blue Tea Meme

2007-11-25T15:18:00.002+04:00

Blue Tea Meme

Dawn has tagged me for the Blue Tea Meme! According to the rules I need to devise a list of 5-10 courses I would take to fix my life.

Rules:
It’s more fun to be in classes with friends, so include one class from the person who tagged you that you’d also like to take.
Tag five other bloggers.

P.S.: I think I have been more prompt with this meme than I have ever been

Here’s my course schedule:

How to be lazy without ever feeling guilty: Since I am the laziest person I know and actually don't feel guilty about taking time out and enjoying myself, I would give a kick ass course. So everyone who is a workaholic and can't relax please join this course with me

How to say 'NO' to Pushy People: For this course I am having a specialist flown in, a certified sayer of 'NO', since I am very bad at saying 'no' to people and often get roped in to do other people's jobs, I desperately need this course.

How to get the last word in ;-D: According to my hubby I ace at this - so I thought why not spread the joy

How to be less paranoid: This is a course that I desperately need these days - tried out a few teachers but they haven't worked. Looking for an expert as we speak. Classes will commence as soon as I find a good one

Webmaster: This is a course I am going to take with Dawn aka Twisted Sister as I am fascinated with all things web-related.

5 people I tag

Titania Starlight
Sandip [I want to see the clever postcard that he can make for this]
Amel's Realm
jYankee
Mariuca

Giving thanks... why is it so tough???

2007-11-22T13:58:00.000+04:00

We are always thinking about the one that got away and so we forget to be thankful for the one that we have. It's sad but it is true. In the enumerating of the things that we don't have we forget everything that we do.

Most of us are always looking at the house that's better than us and never the homeless. Only when everything gets taken away do we realize the beauty of what we had and didn't appreciate... so here's hoping we can all find things we are grateful for.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING to all my American friends.
In fact we should all give thanks for the pleasures we do have...

I would also like to thank Jeff and Meleah for the wonderful awards they bestowed on me. To Jeff whose own blog is such a great blend of humor and strength and honest vulnerability, '

The "Be the Blog Award" is given to blogs that, according to Mark, "really sums up what a successful blogger does. And what I mean by successful is that they make it their own, stay with it, are interactive with their readers, and just plain have fun."

Thank you for the wonderful BTB award and your kind words....
"Now, to nominate someone for this award. I will have to give it to Random Magus. Every time I read that blog, I usually find something there that makes me think. I haven't really been able to get back into the swing of reading and commenting on blogs lately, but RM was the first thing that popped into my mind. I have noticed that she hasn't written in a while, but her archives are just full of thoughtful nuggets that will keep you busy until she gets back."

I in turn would like to present this award to Greg, whose blogs are a constant source of entertainment and education... an who is a kick ass writer

And to my lovely friend Meleah whose blogs I love and who is such an amazing person, strong and kind..

Rules: The people given this award are encouraged to post it on their own blogs; list three things they believe are necessary for good, powerful writing; and then pass the award on to the five blogs they want to honour, who in turn pass it on to five others, etc etc. Let’s send a roar through the blogosphere!

Three Things I Believe Are Necessary For Good Powerful Writing:

1. The desire to write

2. Discipline

3. Knowledge of random things

I would like to pass this on to the following blogs because of their sheer writing prowess

The Angry Barcode aka Intellectual Hedonism

A matter of the heart... or the brain??

2007-11-19T01:47:00.000+04:00

You remember the time when you just started going out and your heart felt like it would burst with all the love you were feeling. This is the stage when your partner could do no wrong, the pedestal was studded with diamonds, things that will irritate the crap out of you later are so endearing and you stare in wide-eyed wonder at everything that comes out of that hallowed mouth. You need no one else and you are the couple that other couples look at with various expressions. Some are just plain annoyed at being unwilling spectators to unwarned PDA, others look with envy and yet others with a knowing look that says 'enjoy it while you can, it won't last forever'. Well scientifically speaking the last ones are the most correct.

When we meet someone that we fall in love with we are on cloud nine, thinking about them is the most pleasurable thing in the world. We feel like we are on an emotional high which is the most rewarding sensation we have ever experienced. We are blind to all faults and the thoughts of our loved one makes us tingle with pleasure.

The glamorous explanation is that love literally makes our heart go soft and gooey and our eyes twinkle but the more accurate explanation is that love has got more to do with what's happening in our brains or rather to our brains physically than our hearts.

When we fall in love, the reward or pleasure center in our brain gets activated, and starts firing every time we see our beloved or think about them and at the same time the part of our brain which is responsible for critical evaluations and judgments gets muted, explaining why the person we love, can literally do no wrong and why we idolize them. According to research this phenomenon lasts for two to three years... this is of course for the preservation of the species.

The mystery to some of the most stupendous stupidity shown by most couples in love has been solved....Love literally makes us or rather our brains go blind!!!

To speak or not....

2007-11-15T13:45:00.000+04:00

Have you ever been in a position where one action of yours could affect someone else's life in a big way? This person may or may not be a very close friend [I suppose that would play a very important role in your decision].

At times like this, it's like the two opposing decisions, action and inaction, both struggle ferociously to supersede each other. And in this conflict the question of choosing the right rears its head, so what do you do?

Take the easy way out or go for the tougher one?

When you are in a dilemma- do you choose to be comfortable or do you take the more difficult path.

It's easy to be silent and tell yourself you don't want to interfere in other people's lives and that you have no business minding other people's business especially when that means getting out of your comfort zone and being in the position where you have to be the one who gets to do the 'unpleasant' task. But the question still remains whether you are not interfering because you want to stay out of a messy business and not be responsible for possibly disastrous consequences or because you actually not the interfering sort. Of course if its the action that matters than your reasons for doing or not doing don't really count just the consequence of the action.

I think the one question to ask would be what would you want the other person to do if you were in their position. Would you want to hear the unpleasant truth? Is it wise to say what's on your mind or hold back because you don't know what the repercussions would be if you opened your mouth?

Law of Diminshing Returns???

2007-10-25T22:19:00.000+04:00

I have been going over this in my head for the last few days - why do we lose interest in things? The same things we might have fought tooth and nail for, hurt other people for, lied for - yet sooner or later that very thing loses its allure.

I have observed this in so many people of so many different backgrounds so I know it's not a culture thing - it's a human condition.

Nothing makes us happy for too long, not those gorgeous boots that look so sexy or the 10 lost pounds or that amazing new game we played. We get hooked, we conquer it and then it stops giving us the same happiness.

Happiness is a totally separate issue so perhaps I should leave that out right now, I am going to limit myself to interest. There are things that we can't wait to do, that are irresistible to us, we are obsessed yet when after a lot of effort they become part of our lives and routine they simply stop being as appealing to us.

Is it because they have become our routine that they stop being exciting?

Perhaps Economics would explain it better than psychology or philosophy - is it merely a case of diminishing returns?

This famous law was first written about by a Frenchman, Anne Robert Jacques Turgot and then alluded to by Thomas Malthus in his Essay on the Principle of Population (1798).

When one of the factors of production is held fixed in supply, successive additions of the other factors will lead to an increase in returns up to a point, but beyond this point returns will diminish

After getting those lovely boots and wearing them a couple of times or driving that sexy car, a point comes when the thrill kind of dies down. We become used to it.

Psychology would explain it as perhaps the human nature to want to conquer and once that need is met and the prey captured, interest lost.

I wonder why it happens though? What do you think

It's me B'dy today

2007-10-20T10:54:00.000+04:00

Hey all - another year older today. Have a great day plan with lunch at the boardwalk with 25-30 friends. Some live here some happen to be visiting. Then from there we'll go to 360 which is a roof-deck bar cum nightclub but on Friday and Saturday they start from 5 pm. It's pretty cool!
Hope this year will be totally rocking :)

Pardon me - I'm a procrastinator

2007-10-18T13:49:00.001+04:00

I think the word procrastination finds a new depth of meaning with me, but I am being harsh with myself. Have been AWOL because I was pretty sick the last week. A bit better now, going for tests on Saturday.

Anyway I have been amazingly lazy in honoring some tags and so apologize to everyone.

The first one was a desktop meme which I was tagged by Marzie, Twister Sister and Amel's Realm. And a just recently Titania as well. So here's what my desktop looks like

I also wanted to thank Amel's Realm for the wonderful awards she gave me, 'Totally Fab' award and 'Schmooze' award. Thank you so much.

And now for the dinner party meme
Dinner Party Meme: Come and Join Me! ;-D

Amel’s Realm has tagged me to do this meme. Since Halloween is coming up I think I will make my party a cool Halloween shindig.

Since I can’t cook it will all be catered. ☺

This is how it will look!

Pictures from www.hostesswiththemostess.com/themes/halloween

The rules as set out by Graham (the originator of this meme) are as follows:-

The idea is to work your way through the eight phases of the dinner party, answering all of the questions on the way - being as honest and creative as you wish. Once your homework has been completed, please nominate any bloggers who's "virtual" dinner party you would love to hear about.

1) The Dinner Party Theme: You have decided to hold a dinner party. When writing the invites you clearly state that fancy dress must be worn. Assuming that cost is no issue, who or what would you dress up as, and why?

Could I be anyone other than Catwoman - I don't think so.

2) The Invitations: This dinner party is for 6 people (including yourself), you are allowed to invite any 5 other people (either past, present, real or fictional), who would you invite and why?

6 people - this puts me in a predicament. I think this party calls for fun and excitement and a little danger....
1. Superman
2. Lex Luthor
3. Batman
4. Joker
5. Wonder woman
6. Circe

This is going to be blood curdling fun. I can't wait...meeeooowww
Who cares if I'm breaking the rules by not counting myself - I am Catwoman I can do anything......

3) The Starter: You are preparing the menu, which dish(es) would you choose as the starter, and why?

I have left it all to the caterers they did send some pictures.

Snake Bites **************** Jumbo Shrimps ************Torched Pumpkin Strips

Pictures taken from: The Food Network and Perfect Entertaining.

4) The Main Course: Okay, now for the main course? and what drink would you serve with it?
There is going to be a lavish buffet of dishes from all corners of the world. After all it's a gathering of the greatest heroes and their nemesis...

Some of the dishes include:
Steak Bites with Bloody Mary dipping sauce

-----------------------------------------------------Baked Bones

Barbequed Bat wings

Drinks: Unlimited - I plan to get my guests VERY drunk *insert evil laugh here*

5) The Sweet: Finally, the sweet. Which would you choose, and why?

It will be a bewitched cake but of course...

6) The Entertainment: The dinner party has gone swimmingly, everybody has had fun, conversation and drinks have been flowing all evening. At the end of the meal you announce that everybody should perform their 'party piece' (no matter how strange or pointless). What party piece would you perform?

This is where I set my plan in motion and take the guests to my underground fight club where I already have very interesting fights and bets going on. I wanted to add theses heroes to my plethora...muuhhaaaa

Picture taken from: askani.wordpress.com

7) The End Of The Evening: The party is over, everybody has gone home, the house suddenly feels empty and quiet. Your eyes fix on the hi-fi in the corner of the room. You search though your CD collection to put on some music as you want to listen to one more track before your retire to bed. Which track would you play?

Born to be Wild!!!!!!

Picture taken from: www.digitalmarketinggroup.biz/flowerpower

P.S: If I have forgotten any other meme or award - please let me know....

Of Dreams...

2007-10-11T06:11:00.000+04:00

There are some things in life that should always stay a fantasy, a dream, a beautiful piece of fiction that gives you joy.

Because when and if it comes true - guaranteed it'll never be as rich and varied as it is in your dreams.

Because in your dreams you are not the writer or the creator just the spectator living a story, but each time with a different end and a different beginning. Powerless yet totally enthralled.

That's what's so wonderfully liberating about dreams, a free ticket to travel to lands - enchanted and magical. Beautiful beyond your wildest imagination unpredictable and dangerous at times, sweet and innocent at others.

Dreams - the little pieces of fiction that belongs to only us - heard by no one, seen by no one - shared with no one!

A precious gift - that we take for granted but never should

Picture taken from: http://images.google.ae/imgres?imgurl=http://medusaeyes.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2006/10/dreams.

Hi!

2007-10-09T22:38:00.000+04:00

Hey guys sorry for disappearing like this. Had a little too much on my plate, physically, mentally and emotionally. College was crazy, dad was over, had to handle too many unexpected series of bad news.

Now I am trying to quit smoking - and it's not easy. Just had two today... So have been pretty much residing [read that as hiding] in my shell. It takes so much effort even to peak out. I'm slightly imbalanced that way. But today I thought I must.

Waiting for some pretty big news which I will get in around ten days so wish me luck and remember me in your prayers.

Nervous as hell about it!

Amsterdam: A Photo Journey: Thursday Thirteen... Attempt 7

2007-09-27T23:59:00.000+04:00

Thirteen photos from My trip to Amsterdam


I just bought a scanner, I've been meaning to do that for quite a long time, since I'm really lazy it took this long. Anyway I wanted to scan some pictures. As I was going through my album I decided to do a photologue of my Amsterdam trip in 2004. I just love that city, it was tough to stick to 13 but I had to as this Thursday 13 not 130. So I picked some of my favorites. We were a group of around 10 friends and to say that we had a ball would be an understatement

1. Dam Square is the physical center of the city and embodies the essence of Amsterdam. You can sit for hours and watch, there are people walking, cycles, trams, buses, cars and taxis on the same road which is hundreds of years old.

2. The Royal Palace on Dam Square. Jacob van Campen designed this building as a city hall, which it was until 1808, when Napoleon's brother Louis Bonaparte ruled Holland for 5 years. He thought the building fit for a king, and ever since this has been the official palace for the reigning queen or king of the Netherlands.

3. Leidseplein is a small square, with numerous bars and and street performers; everything from jugglers and fire-eaters to percussionists, mime players and clowns. If you look at the street lamp you'll see one acrobat

4. Rembrandtplien, which at night becomes quite the hotspot!

5. At Vondelpark which is the largest park of the city, close to the Leidseplein and the big museums. Filled with people, both visitors and locals. It's really beautiful

6. Getting on one of the trams that takes you from one part of the city to another. They are adorable.

7. Sitting outside the Van Gogh museum - that was such a trip. One of my dreams come true. Unfortunately the 250-room Rijksmuseum,[the one in the background], which contains a handful of exquisite Vermeers and one of the best Rembrandt collections in the world, was closed for renovation:(

8. Enjoying a cold beer

9. I think this is Jordaan - an easygoing and peaceful area, with lots of bars, restaurants and interesting little shops.

10. The canals are one of the major attractions of the 'Venice of the North'. They look so pretty and at night when the lights are on and the bridges are illuminated, the entire place looks enchanted. The four main city center canals are Prinsengracht, Herengracht, Keizersgracht and Singel, and of course there are numerous smaller canals.

11. Don't remember where this is - just remember that I had gone shopping .

12. We ate a lot - it was fun sitting and watching people pass by!

13. This was the Dance Valley - a dance festival attended by around 40-50000 people. It's hardcore fun!

(leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

1. Finding Life's Enchantments
2. Echoes of Grace

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Walk like an Egyptian...

2007-09-26T14:49:00.000+04:00

I was waiting at the hospital, and decided that instead of getting impatient and ill-tempered as I usually do when I have to wait, I'd people watch, and a hospital and especially one in Dubai is the best place to do that [there are people from all over the world here].

I noticed a really funny thing, now mind you, this is just a hypothesis which has been induced after a few random observations and would need much deeper investigation to be proved or disproved. And of course this will be a continuing endeavor in which hopefully you all can help as well.

So my hypothesis or observation is this:
People from different parts of the world walk differently. Arabs have a different walk, Indians a different one, Central Europeans a different one.

Seriously I'm not joking. I realized this as I saw a woman's back as she was walking past me, she was wearing the traditional Arabic dress, the long black coat [abaya] but the way she was walking was not like an Arab [the women look like they are gliding when they walk, and this one was walking very purposefully]. So to assuage my curiosity I walked to the cashier a little ahead and lo and behold I was right although she was wearing the hijab, she wasn't an Arab [different language]. After that I watched a few more people and a fascinating pattern emerged and I decided this is something that I'll investigate further.

I intend to continue observing people to see whether this was a random occurrence or do people from different parts of the world do have a different walk. Maybe I'll have to broaden my groups but it seems like it'll be a fun thing to do.

Have you noticed this?

It's all relative

2007-09-24T15:06:00.000+04:00

Have you noticed how the same thing can invoke two very different reactions and feelings in us. A cool breeze on a hot summer's day can feel heavenly but the same breeze when we are cold and don't have a shawl can be most wretched and unbearable. When we are sad everything seems ordinary, the most beautiful picture that may have moved us to tears of joy at other times can appear lackluster.

There are so many examples of this phenomenon happening, all of us have been through experiences that have at one time made us feel over the moon with joy and other times left us cold.

So maybe it's not the experience or the thing that is in itself sad or happy, pleasant or unpleasant, but us who embody those experiences with meaning. So these terms are relative to our moods and our inner states, to the time and space we are inhabiting at that moment.

A flower on its own is neither beautiful or non-beautiful it is a person who makes it beautiful.

P.S.: We move in circles - I had written something very similar to this in April - one of my first few posts. So my development is not linear it's spiral...round and round [that's not good]

'Mine's bigger than yours' syndrome...albeit with style

2007-09-20T00:50:00.001+04:00

If there were ever any city that believes ‘bigger is truly better’ it would have to be Dubai. There is penchant for breaking all sorts of records whether it be in building the world’s tallest towers [the word ‘Burj’ means tower] or setting a record for…wait for it… putting on the world’s largest display of traditional rice dumplings.

The latest star actually ‘seven-star’ project is a Dhs 1.8bn jungle-themed offshore hotel in Dubai that will only be accessible via helicopter or boat, according to ‘Emirates Today’. The retreat will be called Apeiron and from the descriptions I have read, is truly going to be a paradise on earth. A UAE business group is funding the hotel. The hotel, which will be located on a man-made island about 400 meters off Dubai's coast, has plans to combine wildlife, private lagoons, beaches, an underwater restaurant with views to the surrounding lagoons and coral, art gallery, and retail shopping, cinemas, spas, conference facilities and a thick butterfly jungle spreading across the top two floors and a butterfly jungle.

The architect is Simon Mitchell, from Sybarite Architect, a London Based company. According to the him, “The butterfly jungle will be created by controlling the humidity and heat level in the jungle area. The temperature and humidity would be artificially regulated to make it a very relaxing space and a thick natural habitat for butterflies and other insects,”

There will be an underwater gym and spa that look out on the central lagoon. Colorful coral reefs will also surround the hotel. The hotel will offer yacht and helicopter service to ferry guests to and from the island. Those arriving by air will land at a helipad 55 meters above the Gulf and connecting to the hotel’s ninth floor. Yachts can moor in the heart of the building’s core

The silhouette is breath taking and dramatic guaranteeing it a place in the history books.

"The apeiron, from which the elements [are formed], is something that is different" - Anaximander of Miletus (610-656 B.C.)

The name ‘Apeiron’ hotel is derived from Anaximander’s 6th century BC cosmological theory. He believed the beginning of time to be an endless, unlimited mass, subject to neither old age nor decay; perpetually yielding fresh materials from which everything we can perceive are derived. Mankind was supposed by Anaximander to have sprung from some other species of animals, probably aquatic. But as the measureless and endless had been the prime cause of the motion into separate existences and individual forms, so also, according to the just award of destiny, these forms would at an appointed season suffer the vengeance due to their earlier act of separation, and return into the vague immensity whence they had issued. Thus the world, and all definite existences contained in it, would lose their independence and disappear in the "indeterminate." Wikipedia

The alternate name is Crescent Lagoon. The Crescent Lagoon is an underwater sculpted landscape with colourful corals & sea water plant life cultivated to create a unique & surreal world. On Level 00 there's a boat jetty in the building’s atrium & from this level there is access to the private beach, gardens, fresh water pools & the crescent lagoon. The building atrium is over 50m high. On Level 00 & -01 (under the beach) a Health Club and Spa is located containing private saunas, steam, treatment and massage rooms and several fresh water pools at different temperatures located outside as well as inside with different lighting at night. Large windows from the Level -01 Spa offer the opportunity to look into the lagoon and see the coral & fish; day and night. On Level 09 a helipad located 55m above the Arabian Gulf with bridge access across to the ninth floor of the hotel. On Level 11 an outdoor garden with views down the atrium through the building to the sea below & boat jetty as well as views out to sea. Dramatic surroundings with the remainder of the building lifting from the garden level, full size palm trees & fresh water pools. Pools in turn light the restaurant & art gallery below. On Level 28 a double height rooftop Butterfly Jungle level with a unique backdrop of the Arabian Gulf nearly 200m below. The temperature & humidity would be artificially controlled to make it a very relaxing & unique space. The hotel will also contains a number of private clubs, private cinemas, luxury boutiques, conference rooms, restaurants with menus from all around the world. Restaurants & bars (alcoholic & non alcoholic) distributed throughout building from Level 28 to the underwater restaurant at Level -01. The building’s shape creates natural shade on the brunt of the external facades to protect against the direct noon sunlight (which is harsh in the Gulf). The internal façade has louvers to prevent direct solar gain and the louvers are made up of solar cells as is the ribbon that frames the building and gives the Apeiron it’s name (meaning infinity). The energy calculations estimate that the building will generate two thirds of its own energy.

From www.worldarchitecturenews.com

Staying in this futuristic high tech hotel will no doubt be unaffordable for many but it is a wonder to behold.

2007-09-16T01:21:00.000+04:00

I got a message from my best friend today. Her husband's cousin just 35, was going to meet his mom and it was late, he didn't want to drive as he was too sleepy so he decided to call a cab. On the way to the airport the taxi rammed into a stationary truck killing both.

She asked me how does a family deal with such a thing. I didn't know what to say.
This was my reply

Dear Bis
Death is so difficult for the ones left behind - it seems so arbitrary and sudden. I just don't know what to say - it's a concept that cannot be grasped as its not possible to experience it first then talk about it, at best it can just be mourned. I can't even begin to imagine what his mother must be going through. I am so sorry for the whole family.

It seems so senseless that we have to make plans when we don't even know about tomorrow. I think in that way human beings are really brave - noble even.

At first I used to think that we were arrogant to make plans when we didn't know what tomorrow could bring forth, but now I think we are courageous. God has put forth the most difficult task on our shoulders. He EXPECTS us to live, to make plans all the while knowing that all those plans can come to naught the next second.

My condolences again :(

So how do we do it?

Note: Death and the concept of death holds for people who don't believe in God as well - so what are your opinions?

Random

2007-09-15T02:26:00.000+04:00

Erratic Much?

2007-09-13T01:47:00.000+04:00

Hey everyone - have been really erratic with my blogging and looks like the coming two weeks are going to be insane. So I apologize for not commenting the way I do normally, as well as taking so long to reply to the comments left behind. Hopefully things should settle down soon. I miss not having time for my blog :(

Edited to add:- Before I forget again I must thank Blur and Michelle for giving me the 'Nice Matters' Award and also apologize for taking so long to say thank you. Marzie had given me this award earlier on and I had thanked her, but thank you again:)
And thank you to Titania for the 'You Make me Smile' award.

Well! Getting it made me smile:)

Warning :another postcard coming up........ *grins sheepishly*

2007-09-11T00:34:00.000+04:00

I posted this on Paisley's wonderful blog called The Ink Pot, which I think is simply fabulous. I love contributing to it...

So today I though I'd publish the postcard version of the poem here. As you all know by now that I have a personality disorder bordering on obsessive-compulsive and indeed making postcards has joined the list of my various obsessions.

Nonsense Story Meme

2007-09-09T12:01:00.000+04:00

Twisted Sisters from Twisted Sister...totally pissed off tagged me with this “nonsense story meme…”

I checked it out on their site and was laughing at the story - a much needed laugh. It is a clever meme which does not center around a person. It's a wacky story and its fun.

Here are the rules from Gracie’s site.
1. Copy and paste the story below, and the rules, on your blog.
2. Find out who you’re going to tag. (2-3 people, or more, if you wish)
3. Write one or two sentences to continue the story, and use the titles of the blogs you’re tagging or any word(s) associated with them as keywords in the links you include in your part of the story.
4. Remember to tell your taggees that you’ve tagged them!
5. Feel free to use this and start your own viral link story. I’d very much appreciate a link back to Mother’s Home ! if you do. (Or a tag, if you prefer!)

Here’s the beginning:

Mother’s Home! the cave troll yelled. I have been out all day strangling chickens like CRAZY! for the evil Empress. All i want now is a MOment to myself, but i keep getting Linda talking Drivel, but that is better than a certain someone Mooing. Then suddenly what should appear but the NOT evil Empress and all her strangled chickens and Mags cooked them all up and made us a lovely cake to eat. Gracie wanted all the cake for herself but the NOT evil Empress was able to hack off a good sized slab for herself!!! Ha ha ha, Gracie belched loudly after eating all the scrumptious cake that Mags had baked and watched Callie scrappin’ with Sarge about who was gonna win Big Brother 8. Sarge started humming “Dixie,” and almost choked on the bite of cake in his mouth! So he got some coffee to go to wash down the cake. The coffee helped a bit but he had to vocalize before he started singing again so he began, “Mi mi mi mi mi mi mi mi mi mi mi mi…”

…who heard him all the way from Bloggingham Palace and said, “Where is that awful noise coming from? Is there a sick wailing Wacky Mom loose in the woods?” She said, “I’ll bet Songbird can teach him to sing!” but she was busy BONDing in the desert with Kathleen who sat writing heresy in her diary. She was absolutely no help. So Mi-Mi asked Kat to put him on the PP&P list to save his sorry soul. Alas, Ralph the Airhead made a new batch but the Patti-cakes fell in Polliwog’s Pond and nobody got to eat cake after all! It was all Bee’s fault (somehow). Feeling sorry for herself, she pranced over to Odat’s for a dance but she only heard strange mumbling…

That mumbling, however, resulted from The Alien Next Door trying to clone Justin Stanely’s Weblog. The meticulous and risky cloning occurred throughout several millennia, past, present, and future. Or so it seemed; no one could keep count. It was just too much. The mind-numbing years had finally sublimed the earth into a pristine Bobbarama. All well and good, said Bob, but whatever happened to the rules? Before anyone got hurt, however, enough stars fell and crashed to alert Sci-Fi Girl, who grabbed her laptop and returned to the woods, where Mimi’s Dating Profile popped up, allowing a lion to lie happily next to a lamb…

Now, the insane writer burst into the forest, kissing the dogwood and sat on the lion, spinning tales about sci-fi girl’s boyfriend, sci-fi guy, who had his eye on [her] DNA, which he was hoping to sell for anything goes. But just then the mad goat lady and the drowsey monkey pranced into the forest and sang a truly quiet symphony, which annoyed the insane writer.

“What’s that funky sound?” screamed sci-fi guy.

“Well, it sure isn’t a raspberry-latte!” grumbled the insane writer. “Get a grip, sci-fi guy! You’re my main character! I expect you to know how to split an atom! Ignore that woman and her indolent pet! Now, go and do your dastardly thing!”

Kissing the dogwood had been a lure, a trap set by the Mighty Morgan to take control of the BlogWood. Those petulant witches disguised as writers must be eradicated, them and their man slaves. She stuck her talons into the lion with A Twist and a Skewer till it rolled over and laughingly pleaded to go back to Neverland where it had been extremely happy. Her faithful followers, the Gargons grouped around her skirt folds, drooling and kissing her hem in adoration. “Here, take this poison” she commanded, “why? (asked) paisley“, the only rebel in the camp. “To blight their computers my little friends, it’s a special potion A Bit of This and a Dash of the Other“…she smiled mysteriously in her best Mae West accent and set off in search of the Englebert Humperdink Fan Club.

well they searched all over boricua in texas….till they found just write road… aha this was the place… if they could just get in the front row,, surely that was the place that screamed “flash your knickers here“… and oh yes… they would… in doing so they could only hope to distract the masses long enough for the twisted sisters to sneak in with the special potion they had cooked up………

Disguised as margarita's with colorful umbrellas, they sipped the potion while sitting in a nice place in the sun until they were laughing hysterically and begging for more comedy. Meanwhile, a random Magus roamed the woods searching for the golden icon that was being guarded by the Priory of Firefox.
The icon held all the secrets of the blogging world, and these secrets were to remain hidden for all time...

We have to climb this tree of magically changing heights to get to the dangerous land of Greg's Brain for there we can unlock the secret of the icon, the icon called Remedial Rumination - what did it mean?. They crossed amel's realm but the passageway was really dark, where is Titania Starlight when you need her we could do with some of her shining, said Meleah Rebeccah
The two of them looked at each other and then gazing into the abyss...they had an idea, an idea so brilliant....they laughed hysterically - Rubyshooz...but of course they will take us there

Random

2007-09-06T03:53:00.000+04:00

Intentions v/s Actions [post # 100]

2007-09-03T12:50:00.000+04:00

Ever since Greg's comments on my 'Is there an Athena living in my Head too' post, I have been grappling with the intention vs action issue, or debate, or whatever you want to call it.

If it's our actions that make us who we are, then what happens when we do apparently 'good' things, like being kind to someone or helping others but we do it with the bad/selfish/self-serving/fake intentions?

Then in the debate of intentions vs actions which one matters more, which one makes the cut so to speak. Out of the two, thinking about doing good but not translating it into action or doing good but not with the purest of intentions at all, which one is the better or worse.

I am really puzzled by this!

P.S. Unrelated - but this is my 100th post. So I made a little postcard via my latest obsession... making postcards ;)

Zakman made me the cutest poster ever and for that I am so touched – thank you from the pit of my heart

Fab 4

2007-09-01T09:46:00.000+04:00

The beautiful HollyGl tagged me with the fun, "Fab Four" meme. So here it is. I made it on the postcard site and figured out how to grab a screen on a Mac [apple, shift, and 4 - the cursor becomes a bull's eye and then you select the area and bam it's done]. The original 1 and 2 can be found in the links provided. Then I read a post by Phil from Thoughtsparks in which he had mentioned a program called Jing which did just that. Thank you, Phil.

P.S.: Are you guys having problems with Blogger as well? For some people's new posts don't show then I have to check in Technorati and access them through there.

My Interview with Mike

2007-08-31T00:30:00.000+04:00

Hey guys! I was interviewed by Mike Thomas for his blog. It is a great blog because it introduces you to other blogs and bloggers.

Thank you Mike, it was fun!

When I saw his mail I had gone for my brother-in-law's wedding and so I did the interview when I got back. He posted it a couple of days ago, but I didn't get a chance to blog about it

It would be really cool if you guys checked it out. And I think there is a voting thing on it.
I couldn't post about it earlier as my mom-in-law is over for a week and I have been out with her all day.
The interview can be found here.

P.S.: And a note
Also, we suggest that you ask your readers to vote for your blog as
the top three will receive $50, $35, and $15 respectively at the end
of the month.

For more info visit: http://bloginterviewer.com/about

Thanks again,

Mike Thomas

Misadventures of 2 Women & 2 Girls

2007-08-29T14:32:00.000+04:00

To forewarn you dear reader the title is the most glamorous of the entire post, the more appropriate name for it should have been 'Blame it on the Wino. But I couldn't resist.

I will not start at the beginning but with a digression as I usually do, my new blogmate Sandip introduced me to this site where you can m ake postcards. So yesterday being an insomniac and not a little crazy, I stayed up all night checking out the site. Browsing my photo gallery for pictures to make an introductory postcard, I thought why not capture a mid-day-going-into-early night madness at my best friend's friends house.

She had her sister & sister-in-law over, during college holidays, so I thought we'd spend time together as they were leaving in a week's time. She picked me up Saturday before last and I took two bottles of wine thinking we'd cook and eat. Her mom and kid had gone to her brother's house so we had the house to ourselves. Well, the evening started innocently enough with her cooking and trying to teach me as well. She's an excellent cook and I, well I, just manage to get by.

We sat in her kitchen, the light was excellent, we thought we'd take some pictures. Not realizing I had not eaten the whole day, actually none of us had, we merrily sipped away at our wine as if there was no tomorrow. Very soon mild inebriation was setting in but we were still composed so to speak. Her younger brother who doesn't drink, came in gave us a disgusted look and left, because by now grown women were screaming and doing obscene things and laughing maniacally.

From the kitchen we went into the bathroom to smoke as there is no smoking in her house. Very soon my hubby [who was working on a Saturday] and hers [who had gone Scuba Diving] came back, mine before his. We insisted we wanted more wine, they desisted but could not say no.

Now drunk, food was forgotten, a lot of merriment ensued, but then her mom came back. Being wise and clever, the girls stayed in the room. I don't know what got into me [I have a problem I always think I have more control than I usually do] I actually had the nerve to go out and make polite conversation, at least try.

What a conversation, this was certainly like no less than the out of body experience that Quasar9 wrote about, when you are watching yourself make a fool of yourself and a voice inside is saying get out, get out now, yet you persist, you sit. I don't know what I was talking about so passionately and incoherently I might add, but I could see through the haze, the slightly pained expression on my husband's face, which signifies that I was just babbling.

Anyway the evening came to an end and I woke up in the morning with a hangover.

I wonder what happened to all that delicious food we cooked. And of course I have not gone to her house in two weeks...how will I face her mom again, I'm beyond mortified. But ahh! what fun was had by all!

If you want to see the postcard more clearly you can check it out the site, this was just a picture I took of it, as the posting to blog feature is not there yet - the postcard pictures

P.S: I FIGURED HOW TO TAKE A SCREEN SHOT ON MY MAC SO NOW IT'S THAT AND NOT THE PHOTOGRAPH OF THE SCREEN

Seven ingredients of me!

2007-08-27T14:33:00.000+04:00

Mariuca tagged me for this meme called the 7 P's, which was created by WVB to learn more about the blogs they read on a regular basis. So here are My 7 Ps.

Passion:

Purpose:

Keep Evolving

Pursuit:
Knowledge

Position:

Trying to ascend

Pummelling:
My Laziness & procrastination [at least trying to]

Progress: S....l.... o.... w...

Personality:
Friendly but slightly aloof [Like a cat]

P.S.: HollyGl, I promise your meme is the next one, I want to make it pretty like this one so give me a little more time as that one is more extensive than this one.
See one of my P's is laziness and procrastination ;-D

Why I love Blogging

2007-08-27T13:47:00.000+04:00

I was thinking about what an amazing experience this has been. I never thought when I first started, that blogging would become such an important part of my life and would be so instrumental in teaching me to be aware of me, of other people and my relation in respect to them.

Without thinking about it consciously, I found myself imbibing the things learnt from blogging, the lessons others generously taught me by sharing their stories and opening their hearts. I learnt that sometimes we have to make the first move and initiate a conversation, and that perhaps the other person is just as shy as we are.

Man is a social animal and he does best in interaction with others he can’t be an island. But for those of us who cannot be as socially accomplished as others, blogging is such a blessing. Because here every voice is translated into words and the distraction of a physical self is not there. It’s you and your reader in an intimate bond of focused intensity on what you are saying.

Of course sometimes it’s easier to be a touched up version of yourself while writing and edit your flaws and mute them into the background and you always have the time lag to put yourself in order.

But this freedom to be who you are or who you want to be is liberating and is in most cases treated with responsibility and truth.

I have read in many blogs questions and doubts about the friendships formed here but to that I would say that’s a lot like any friendship anywhere. Here we share our innermost secrets and in the real world we share a beer.

The one thing that you learn is that no matter what you have felt and what you have gone through you are not alone someone else has been through the same if not worse and when you see them dealing with it with grace you are tempted to do so as well.

This post was inspired by getting a lovely award from The Twisted Sisters whose blog is unique… it’s funny, it's sad at times, it’s honest and brave and I want to say I love your Blog!

In turn I present this award to EVERYONE on my blog roll. Some are very new additions which I recently discovered and others are blogs from when I started...
I love all your blogs that's why I visit everyday!

Thank you for being a part of my life

My Blogroll

Jogging to Beethoven

2007-08-25T23:39:00.000+04:00

I discovered something awesome today. I was in the gym upstairs and usually while exercising I have dance music on, to be able to jog intermittently and at the end of the 45 minutes I am dead. Since I am not really regular I always end up a pushing myself too hard and the result afterwards is body in trauma and head spinning. Of course the feeling of accomplishment is there and the endorphins are making their rounds but you come back to your apartment feeling anything but relaxed.

Today I was listening to WGBH's podcast of classical music on my iPod instead. They were playing Beethoven's Violin Sonata No. 9 in A major, commonly known as the Kreutzer Sonata. One of his best-known sonatas written for piano and violin. After which more Beethoven followed. I can’t tell you how amazing the synchronicity between the mind and body that followed was. I was so taken by surprise. Jogging was easier it wasn't the frenetic pushing yourself to do 30 more seconds – it was as if the mind was orchestrating the body in perfect movements and there was a feeling of calm. I was so surprised because although my electronic selection for my exercise routine does give me the energy. It is a very different energy from the one that I felt today. That energy is like the artificial Red Bull effect, today it was organic flowing like good chi throughout my body. I exercised far longer than ever and far more intensely but felt no strain.

The entire day my state of mind had been like a disturbed ECG report with spikes of irritation and crankiness. But at the end of an hour of the treadmill today I felt what a very creased pair of trousers would feel, if it could have feelings, after a bout of thorough professional ironing. I was fascinated, of course it’s not the first time I had heard classical music, but it was the first time I had paired exercising with it. So I researched into sound waves, frequencies and our bodily reactions to it.

Low frequency sound waves make us uncomfortable. The lowest are called infrasound, sounds that emanate from machinery and stuff in the house like ventilation and cooling/heating systems. Low frequency waves can cause symptoms such as nausea, headaches, fatigue, insomnia, vibration of internal organs and a feeling of oppression.

This is what I found on the net in an ezine article by Tania Gabrielle French …

On the other hand, certain high frequency sounds literally energize your mind. Scientists have found that sounds from 5,000 to 8,000 hertz recharge your brain’s batteries.

If your CD collection includes music by Mozart, Baroque Music or even Tibetan Chants, keep listening. In numerous studies, these sounds have been found to charge the cortex of the brain and stimulate health and wellness.

At 120-125 hertz you begin to hear the kick drums and bass guitar common to rock music. These lower frequencies produce the opposite effect - they drain us.

Why is this?

Because they have wave-lengths longer than we are tall, which is why lower frequencies are FELT as well as heard. You can feel this low frequency full-body sensation at dance clubs and rock concerts. Or from listening to most FM radio stations.

Since we are mostly exposed to low frequency sounds in the media, I strongly suggest you balance your brain and body by listening to high frequency classical music at least once a day. It’s easy and effortless – and great for you.

So next time you are exercising forget your usual disco/hip hop/dance/electro/techno collection and pick up Beethoven instead!

A Bizarre Thought/Question!

2007-08-23T14:53:00.000+04:00

I have been thinking about the things we cling to - the memories that have such an effect on us that they become the glasses that we view the world with. The shit that happened to us when we were young, the shit we did to ourselves. Reading various blogs on how people unconsciously or consciously make decisions that they know will bring them nothing but pain and degradation made me wonder why we all react the way we do.

The 'broken' do it out of a sense of self that insists that they deserve the worst of treatments and that every bad thing that happens to them is because of how they acted in the past and that they deserve nothing but the worst and that is all they can handle or ever want.

But what happens when something terrible happens to someone in their past but their brain just wipes it out, except for a few haunting traces? Take for example a hypothetical case of a person who might have been abused as a child or have had some other horrible thing happened to them but they don't recall or remember it clearly. Maybe they have buried it so deep inside that except for a few flashes they don't remember anything else. They don't talk about it or tell it to anyone and even if they ever did, it would be in a passing sentence.

So what happens then - when you don't consciously remember something. When you have no particular person to hate or blame categorically? Does it affect your behavior subconsciously? If one blanks out a certain period in one's life and remembers just very distant glimpses of it - does the past then count?

Think about it if you can't recall the memory of pain or recall it faintly... how much does it matter? As much as you recall it?

If you can't remember what happened.... does it then count?

Do you want to know a secret????

2007-08-21T17:57:00.000+04:00

Ss...secret...The very word sounds so alluring. It's like being invited into a club where only very intimate friends are allowed to go. When someone tells you that they are about to tell you a secret - there is an immediate action. Both physical and mental. It's a visceral reaction.

Your heart starts to pound slightly and adrenaline makes its rounds, energizing your senses. The mental effect is of course more subtle and happens on many levels. There is pleasure at being a secret keeper as well as a certain apprehension.

In my previous post I had talked about how we assign a complete imagery and various connotations to words and the word secret is another that fits the category. It brings a plethora of images and meanings to our mind.

When I looked it up in dictionary.com I got the following result

Secrecy
Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia - Cite This Source

Secrecy is the practice of sharing information among a group of people, which can be as small as one person, while hiding it from others. That which is kept hidden is known as the secret. Secrecy is often controversial. Many people claim that, at least in some situations, it is better for everyone if everyone knows all the facts—there should be no secrets. The closely allied, perhaps even synonymous notions of confidentiality and privacy are often considered virtues. William Penn wrote, "It is wise not to seek a secret; and honest, not to reveal one."

Natural and sociological secrecy
Secrecy is built into biology. One reason for sexual reproduction and speciation may be to allow members of a species to share genetic improvements without those improvements becoming available to competitors . Animals, including humans (in some cases), conceal the location of their den or nest from predators. Humans attempt to consciously conceal aspects of themselves from others due to shame, or from fear of rejection, loss of acceptance, or loss of employment. On a deeper level, humans attempt to conceal aspects of their own self which they are not capable of incorporating psychologically into their conscious being. Families sometimes maintain "family secrets", obliging family members never discuss disagreeable issues concerning the family, either with those outside the family and sometimes even within the family. Many "family secrets" are maintained by using a mutually agreed-upon construct (an official family story) when speaking with outside members. Agreement to maintain the secret is often coerced through "shaming" and reference to family honor. The information may even be something as trivial as a recipe.

There is nothing more decadent and appealing to the voyeur in us then to be invited to a secret... to glimpse into someone else's secret and share our own anonymously and that's exactly the brilliant idea Paisley has.

The Mode:
She has started a new blog called secret..secret...i've got a secret where you can anonymously drop off secrets all you have to do is just post an anonymous comment... it will be emailed to her and she will tell the whole world your secret!!!!!

I think its a great idea and it can be quite cathartic to let go of secrets in the cloak of anonymity. It's exciting because your secret is out there yet your identity still remains a secret. It's like you get to keep it and share it at the same time.
Kind of Cool. So hurry and email your secrets...
...we'll be the members of the club of secrets
Oh my how very glamorous!!

Of Tags, Memes and Awards

2007-08-21T14:27:00.000+04:00

Let me start with an explanation and an apology - I have two deadly nemeses that follow me quite relentlessly [actually I have loads but these two are the ones who were the culprits in this case]... they are laziness and forgetfulness.

So I have been meaning to do this meme/tag I don't know the right phrase that Jean Chia from A Great Pleasure, tagged me with and it took a lot longer than I had anticipated.

So here goes... with apologies for the delay but the deadline was 26th August and at least I didn't miss that. I don't like to miss deadlines

The meme is about completing at least seventeen out of the following twenty seven sentences. For every completed meme before 26th August, Idham will contribute RM127.00 on your behalf to Darul Izzah Orphanage.

1. A person is only as good as ...

2. Friendship is always ... better if you work at it

3. To love is to ...let go of rationality

4. Money makes me ...

5. I miss ... my cats.

6. My way of saying I care is by ... doing something thoughtful

7. I try to spread love and happiness by ...

8. Pick the flowers when ...ever you want them

9. To love someone is to ... accept them

10. Beauty is ... vital.

11. When I was thirteen, what I remember ...

12. When I was twenty one, I remember ...

13. I am most happy when ... I have no obligations or deadlines

14. Nothing makes me happier than ...

15. If I can change one thing, I will change ...

16. If smiles were banned, ... the world wouldn't have nice looking people

17. Wouldn't it be nice if we could ... fly

18. If you want to ask me to smile while taking my picture ... you just have to point the camera in my direction;)

19. Money is not everything but ... it sure does make life easier

20. The most touching moments I have experienced is ...

21. I smile when ... I want to

22. When I am happy, I ... am great company

23. If only I don't have to ... then ... I'll do anything

24. The best thing I did yesterday was ...

25. If I ever write a book, I will give it this title ...

26. One thing I must do before I die is ... live [how utterly corny;)]

27. Doing this meme, I feel like ... I should've done it earlier

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The second meme was not that long ago and I have a valid reason for the delay, I wasn't in town. Mariuca awarded me the opportunity to dream about the things I'd do if I had a million dollars.
Hmm! Very interesting

If I had a $1 million - I'd travel the world over with my friends in style, invest some, give some to people who needed it.

*** Start Copy ***

Instructions :
Proposition: If you Have $1,000,000.00…………………………
Requirements: continue above sentences
Tag Mode: 5 blogger

1st - You leave their blog and post link and add to the list below.
2nd - Let the blogger you want to tag know they been tagged by comment in their blog or etc.What They Do With Their $1 Million

What They Do With Their $1 Million

1. SYH will spend for Family

2. Miche will give to the needy

3. Montessorimum will keepsake

4. Lovely Mummy will spend & save

5. MummyInVain will fully utilise

6. Babyfiona will buy house and open business

7. MonkeyWong will go for a long vacation

8. Emila Yusof will realise her dream

9. Mariuca will open a Perfume Gallery

10.Janice Ng will upgrade house and go for long vacation

11.Hin will blog to donate for charity

12.Bobo will invest in property and let her parents go on a holiday

13.Joe will buy a house and gives to charity

14.Brad will spend all of his money on foolish gadgets

15. Adrian will spend it all

16.Nick will waste away his small fortune

17.Santa will give it all to needy children

18.Brown Baron will hold a $17,500 blog contest

19.Bobby will be on a World vacation forever

20.Seiche will Fix you but good

21.Barrett will do A LOT of Traveling

22.Jean Chia will open a 'pet's clothing cum cafe' store
23. Random Magus will travel with friends, invest and give to charity

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And now a special thanks to Mariuca who has two beautiful blogs and is a really sweet and caring person herself. She gave me a Nice Matters award and it came at the righ t moment when I was pondering over how sometimes in life it's the not-so-nice people who get ahead and how when you're nice people simply take advantage of your goodness. So thanks Marzie I needed to remember that sometimes its nice to be nice just because that's who you are...and some people do appreciate that

According to the originator of the Nice Matters award it is intended for “those that are just nice people, good blog friends, and those that inspire good feelings and inspiration! Those that care about others, that are there to lend support, or those that are just a positive influence in our blogging world!”

What's in a meaning?

2007-08-20T15:58:00.000+04:00

Have you noticed how we have assigned negative meanings to some words which by their definition are not but the connotation we give them seem to make them 'not right'. I was having a conversation with one of my best friends and we were talking about God and one of my favorite books, 'Mister God this is Anna', and I was explaining her how it said that God had to be empty.

'Mister god was a bit different from a flower. A yellow flower that didn’t want yellow light was called yellow by us because that is what we saw. You couldn’t say that about Mister god. He wanted everything so he did not reflect anything back; we couldn’t possibly see him could we. So as far as we are concerned Mister God is empty. Not empty because there was truly nothing there but because he accepted everything. Of course you could cheat if you wanted to; you could wear a colored glass marked “MISTER GOD IS LOVING” or bit marked “MISTER GOD IS KIND”, but then of course you would miss the whole nature of Mister God”

While I was explaining this to her I didn't have the benefit of reproducing it like I have here, but in the span of my explaining there was a pause in which the word 'empty' seemed almost sacrilegious.

And then we went on to define 'empty' and we realized that somehow the word 'empty' connotes something else. It's meaning is is nothing bad but when we hear 'empty' we immediately envision things like 'sadness', 'barren' etc etc.

Hey All

2007-08-20T02:42:00.000+04:00

I'm back and its sooooo good to be back and I missed you all so much here's hoping you missed me a bit!!!!

Thank You & See You In 10 Days

2007-08-06T12:57:00.000+04:00

There are moments when you are totally taken in by surprise but in a good way and this was one of them. I was reading Jean Chia's blog A Great Pleasure and I came across a really sweet post in which she was giving awards to bloggers - the special thing about this award is that it is personalized and one of the most unique ones I've seen. It's actually a smoochie and is personally created by her. So thank you so much for your kind words. I'm really touched {{a big hug and kisses}}

"Amber: I know of your existence through Woman: Gods Masterpiece. It was a great interview. From there, I've got to know that you are no ordinary woman. You are an inspiration to others. I've been wanting to know more about you. Glad that I have the chance now. :)"

I'm going to disappear for a week or ten days, will pop in occasionally but probably won't be able to post. Going for brother-in-law's wedding tomorrow morning and will be back in a week!

Will miss you all... muahh!!!

Johari Window

2007-08-04T14:21:00.000+04:00

Hey! Sorry have been AWOL recently - was really busy with college, it was the week before summer vacations and a couple of other things were on my mind. The last course we had was quite fascinating really - it was called 'Sustaining Superior Performance', I know it sounds like a title out of a self-help book and the course was a lot like that, but it was great fun. The teacher was good and the classes quite unique, a mixture of practical exercises, games and just a little bit of lecture. I learnt a lot about myself, for example I learnt that I am really very critical about myself - my own harshest judge.

There was this exercise in which we had a questionnaire of around 40 questions and we had to fill it out, then we chose a partner and had a talk with them for 10 minutes, of course since we have been together for almost two years now we knew each other quite well. After that we had to fill the same questionnaire for our partners. In the end we had the two sets of questionnaire with us one in which we had assessed ourselves and one in which our partner had assessed us.

Almost all the class realized the point that I have been making for a long time i.e. 'What I think of me is not necessarily what others see me as'. I got proof in class

The concept of Johari Window is basically an exploration of the different personalities we have, the ones that others see and the one that is private to us.

Johari Window, named after the first names of its inventors, Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham, is a communication model that illustrates human interaction - it is a way of looking at how our personality expresses itself.

A four paned "window," divides personal awareness into four different types, as represented by its four quadrants: open, hidden, blind, and unknown. Each quadrant represents different kind of personal information. The Johari Window is called window because the lines dividing the four panes are like window shades, which can move as interaction progresses.

The quadrant that is called ‘Open’ is our public personality, this is the face we portray to people and we know about it. The obvious things like ‘extrovert’, ‘talkative’, etc things that are obvious to everyone, including of course the physical aspect of it all 'fat', 'thin', 'pretty' and so on. All information that is open – things I know about myself, and that you know about me. For example things about me that you can siphon of reading my blog, the comments I leave, and of course all that I reveal about my feelings and my likes and dislikes. As we get to know each other better this ‘Open’ personality becomes more accentuated.

Known to self, unknown to others is the ‘Hidden’ quadrant; this contains things that are known to only me, the stuff that I don’t reveal to anybody. All of us while writing in our blogs decide how much we want to share and what we don’t want others to know. Things that we might be ashamed of, things we might want others to never know about ourselves. This quadrant we share with very few if any and even then there are things that we keep only to ourselves. The process in which I shift things from this quadrant to the ‘Open’ quadrant is called Self-disclosure, the process of opening the window wider, which to many of us is a very scary process.

For me the most fascinating quadrant is the ‘Blind Spot’, because this is where others know things about me that I don’t know myself, thus the name, 'blind spot'. I might think I am very introverted or socially challenged or whatever but others might think the opposite. I might think I am not a very good listener or I am lazy but others may have a totally different opinion. This is the quadrant that made me realize that I am just too hard on myself. And since this is knowledge or information that we don’t know about ourselves it’s not something we are putting on as a show for others, its knowledge about ourselves that genuinely shocks us.

The last quadrant titled Unknown also called Grey Areas’ quite frankly doesn’t make any sense to me, as it is knowledge that I don’t have of myself and neither do you. Maybe this is the root of all our psychoses the secret behind our actions – the unconscious.

If you want to see an interactive model and practice it a partner check out this website interactive johari

Judge Not???

2007-07-29T14:27:00.000+04:00

These days everyone emphasizes that you should not make judgments or criticize anyone's actions and we are ‘judgmental’ if we find something that, we god forbid, pronounce any judgment on, silent or otherwise. We should mind our own business and judge not lest we be judged.

If I see something and make a judgment about it, does that imply that I think I’m more virtuous than the other person? Or I have less compassion? Or that I don’t understand the complexities of life and that there are no black and whites just shades of grey? Or that I won’t make the same judgment on myself? Or that I think I'm not capable of making that mistake myself?

I’m sorry but I don’t think that’s true…

Leaving out the whole debate of right and wrong being relative there are things that we see which are blatantly wrong because you know those are actions that will lead to consequences that will hurt innocent people unnecessarily. There do exist some actions that are reprehensible from any point of view. On the level of plain decency, on the levels of friendship, on the levels of personal trust.

The word ‘morals’ is actually derived from the Latin word; ‘mores’ meaning customs so can be used for men’s customary ways of judging conduct. If there exist cultures that appreciate innocent people getting hurt and lifelong friendships being betrayed, I don’t know them.

Forget ethics, forget religion, somethings are wrong on the deepest level of humanity. There are some actions that you don't care so much about the 'right', 'wrong', 'morality' or 'immorality' of them, you just shudder at the disrespect of another human being that it causes and you just pray to God that it doesn't happen to you or you don't cause it to others.

So go ahead judge me for being judgmental...

Is there an Athena living in my head too?

2007-07-26T16:25:00.000+04:00

This is something I've written in my Blogcataog profile so it's not like a new discovery for me - but last night it struck me again and each time it does, it's a shock. This is what I had written

"I have now reached the conclusion that what I think of me might not be what others see me as".

And sometimes the two might actually be totally opposing views. So who's right and who's wrong or is it just relative? I mean if you think about it - the person who knows most about 'me' should be me - it is I who live in my head not others, right?

We are the ones who will have maximum knowledge of ourselves because let's face it, we think about ourselves more than anyone else ever will. Yet don't they say that to be able to see things clearly we need to put distance in between?

We had gone to a friend's get together yesterday, and it was one of those days that I was feeling particularly antisocial and wanting to stay home in bed with a good book, not even on my computer, that was the extent to which I felt the need to be alone. Anyway I had to go. We reached and I noticed myself acting like a consummate socialite, laughing and joking and entertaining people and actually having fun. There were a few people I was meeting for the first time, naturally seeing me like this they assumed that I was a very social, happy, jolly person - an opinion that I do not hold true of me at all.

In the course of the conversation this girl mentioned to me how I was such a happy go lucky person and blah blah. Of course, I thought to myself, you are seeing me today, what would you know. I tried to acquaint her with my view of me and she just gave me a blank stare, I kept insisting that tonight was just one of those surprising nights.

Two people really can't see the same phenomenon, argue many - so if there's this divide between our perception of ourself and someone else's - which one is me? I know they are all part of us, the faces we put on and the roles we play, are facets of our personality.

Whether it's the pretend us or the social us or the snooty us, doesn't make a difference, because we know all to be part of our nature, but to people we meet once, that is the person that is real. So if I tell you, I'm this or that, and you meet someone who has met me when I wasn't like that, who would you believe - especially if you knew both of us for the same time?

This girl I met, who I will probably never meet again, has an image of me, which to me is the total opposite of me but it's the only truth she has of me and will remember me as that for however long she does remember.

And this is just one example of strangers, sometimes this divide is felt when someone who knows us pretty well reveals something about us and we get shocked - that's not me, we think. In those cases who do we believe? Do we doubt our own self observation, or do we doubt whether the other person has understood us, or is it that our thoughts do not translate into our behaviour?

Each possibility poses a unique problem of its own - if the other person has not understood us then how do we make them do so, or will it be an exercise in futility?

Or are they actually right? We know them to be rational and if they have reached this conclusion it would be after observation of our behaviour ergo it must be correct. Then this would mean that we don't practice what we preach.

The whole question of who we really are then becomes quite problematic.

Or is it the case that we see ourselves with rose colored glasses and aren't who we think.

Or maybe, we have an entirely different person who lives hidden inside our head like Athena in Zeus' head, ready to spring out fully formed, any time.

Just tantalizing us with glimpses but never truly revealing themselves either to us or others.

It's quite fascinating and a little bit spooky - I wonder if that person would look like us as well?

2007-07-24T03:39:00.000+04:00

"Is it oblivion or absorption
when things pass from our minds?
- Emily Dickinson

Thomas Moore says when some new thought, feeling, or notion presents itself, we can't forget it or overlook it.

When we have invited it in or agree to live in its company, maybe then it won't be such a preoccupation.

It will be forgotten - not exiled into oblivion, but absorbed into being.

I'm pondering this over - where will they be absorbed? in the brain? in the mind?

meanwhile would love to know what you think.

A Belated Thank You!

2007-07-21T13:24:00.000+04:00

Sorry for taking such a long time in thanking all my kind and sweet friends for these fantastic awards. I am so happy to receive them, as I write this I can clearly remember when I first started this blog and would go to other people's blogs and see all the friends they had and the wonderful camaraderie shared. I would be a little envious and now I can't believe that I too am part of such wonderful and caring circle.

It's so great and I'm so happy that I discovered blogging. It's become such an integral part of my life that everything that happens in the course of the day and all thoughts and internal debates that I have, immediately start taking the shape of a post with the appropriate headline.

I actually use everything learned from this medium in daily life as well, since I'm a 'schmoozer' here which in life outside the computer I'm not, I sometimes replicate things I do here, for example now I'll actually pick up the phone and call someone randomly much like going to a friend's blog and commenting.

So thank you again for making me a part of your life on the net!

HollyGl who is not only beautiful but also incredibly sweet and talented and the remarkable Rebecca from Pixels of the Edge bestowed on me the Creative Blogger award

This award originated with Christy at Writers Reviews, and is "for those who bring unique and creative elements to their blogs. For those who incorporate art, music, creative writing, photo's, and other beautiful visual effects into their website. For those who put a unique spin on things and come up with new ideas. This award is for the artsy, the funky, the inventor, and even the rebel. This award is for those creative individuals who stand out from the crowd."

The blogs I have chosen are either very creative or a showcase of creative things, so whenever you visit you are surrounded by pretty things

Tigergirletsy - She makes really funky unique jewelry which you can check out at her blog
In Cinq - What an amazing idea for a blog, Adria's in cinq pairs the visual with the literary. It is a collection of self portraits sent by different people
Mariuca's perfume gallery - It's all about fragrance in the 'scent sational scent stations' as she calls it. Marzi likes to collect miniature perfumes and this blog is the shrine to her collection. I think it's such a cool idea
Mike French - He's writing this great book 'The Dandelion Tree' and each new chapter get unveiled once he gets 25 diggs, not only is the book great so is the blog visually. You have to read the book
Done4Fun - Silvia's Sketchblog - This blog is an art blog and is a simply beautiful collection of the artists sketches

Find the rules at the end of the post

Seiche whose wonderful blog I recently discovered, gave me the Thoughtful Blogger award and reading the description I was really happy to receive this award, especially from someone who really is such a thoughtful blogger himself - a real gentleman.

The Thoughtful Blogger award was started by Christy at Writer's Reviews and this particular award is... For those who answer blog comments, emails, and make their visitors feel at home on their blogs. For the people who take others feelings into consideration before speaking out and who are kind and courteous. Also for all of those bloggers who spend so much of their time helping others bloggers design, improve, and fix their sites. This award is for those generous bloggers who think of others.

Reading the above description, these are the people I thought of, they fit one or all of the descriptions of a thoughtful blogger

Bobby Revell - For helping me out numerous times with blogging and especially with the recent technorati fave train
Peter Haslem - For acknowledging each and every person's comments and being one of the first bloggers to help me out with my blog
Greg Although he's expressed an aversion to awards, I'll still go ahead, for giving great input and fabulous ideas and answers to various questions
The Real Mother [For being the first one to ever comment on my blog and making me feel so happy]

Blur ting [Again for being one of the first people to welcome me here]

And now, the small print...

1) If you have received an award simply choose either the dark or light background image and save it to your files, then post it proudly on your blog!

2) Pass the award on to five other people, you can choose any of the awards from the series, you do not have to pass out the exact award you received. Choose whichever of the awards below that you'd like to give out. You can give out one of each or five of the same one, whatever you prefer.

3) You can change the size and color of awards to suit your blog, that's up to you, it's your blog, just leave the titles the same.

4) Please link back to this post so that people can read these rules and so that the meanings of the awards will not be lost.

5) If you feel that you or a friend are deserving of an award and no one has given one to you yet then email me at sayhitochristy(at)hotmail.com and tell me about your website!

Against the Tide!

2007-07-20T13:10:00.001+04:00

One of my favorite books is Herman Hesse's Siddhartha, the story of a young man in search of the ultimate truth or meaning of life. He becomes a wandering ascetic, but starving himself of all the world's pleasures doesn't bring him any closer to the truth, then he goes over to the opposite side and becomes a decadent hedonist, losing himself to a world of titillation and pleasure but that merely eats away his spirits and he becomes like the rest of the lost herd.

At the end he realizes that being nothing, doing nothing, just being - being empty, neither a practitioner nor a devotee, neither meditating nor reciting, just putting his ear to the river to blending in with the world, will he find his truth.

In Taoist philosophy, the river is a metaphor for life, never still, always changing. According to the natural order of things the river will always flow towards the sea. If we surrender life will carry us, wherever we want to go. The river's flow is yielding yet strong , with its ability to maneuver itself around all obstacles, its fluidity making it's path easier. It changes constantly to achieve its singular goal - that being to join the sea.

Yet I have always found myself opposing the river, maybe some of the disquietude in my soul can be blamed to not relinquishing myself to the the flow of things and letting things happen the way they are supposed to be. Maybe I try to find the quickest route and hurry and multi-task and get impatient for things to happen, for me to get the answers to all of life's riddles. Maybe I am stupid to be the angry wave, crashing and fighting against the gentle yet powerful river, going against the flow. Not allowing it time to carry me to the sea - swimming upstream for no reason - trying not to get enchanted by the shapes in the cave.

Maybe I should stop the struggle, do nothing, forget the journey and just swim along the decided sea, avoiding a different course. The calm of life's natural flow - invites me to surrender, to carry me, inviting me to trust it and let it make me forget. Yet how can I not know, how can I float blindly. How can I not want to to flee the cave and come back and take you with me?

The Taoist principle of Wu Wei , or the art of inaction says that if we do nothing, matters resolve themselves, essential to Wu Wei is avoidance of exerting pointless effort and contradicting nature. Abandoning tension to arrive at a quietude.

But if I stop asking won't I stop being? Am I vain to want to be - to be the one who goes out and comes back for the rest?

On to Hogwarts Express!

2007-07-19T14:55:00.000+04:00

Being a bit challenged with this technical stuff I had help from the very sweet Bobby, hope I managed to follow the instructions correctly. I love train rides so The Technorati Fave Train, was a journey I was very excited to embark on.
I was added to the Technorati Fave Train yesterday by Bobby. The Train was started at Gary Lee.

So, do you want to ride the train?

***Start Copying Here***
Here are the rules:
1. Write a short introduction paragraph about what how you found the list and include a link to the blog that referred you to the list.
2. COPY the Rules and ENTIRE List below and post it to your blog. To avoid duplicate content and increase the amount of keywords your site can accessible for, go ahead and change the titles of the blog. Just don’t change the links of the blog.
3. Take “My New Faves” and move them into the “The Original Faves” list.
4. Add at least 3 Blogs that you’ve just added to your Technorati Favorites to the “My New Faves” section. Remember to also add the “Fave Me” link next to your new blogs (i.e. http://technorati.com/faves?add=http://www.yourdomain.com)
5. Add Everyone on this list to your Technorati Favorites List by clicking on “Fave the Site.” (Please FAVE EVERYONE on the List prior to posting the list or a Kitten will Die Alone in a Dark Alley Tonight). Those who want good karma will fave you back. If not, you will for sure get the benefits of faves from the bloggers who continue this list after you.

My New Faves

Holly GL - Fave the Site
Meleah Rebeccah - Fave the Site
Blur ting - Fave the Site
The Domestic Minx - Fave the Site

The Original Faves

Gary Lee - Fave the Site *

Amber [Random Magus] - Fave the Site
Mariuca - Fave the Site
JeanChia - Fave the Site
Janice - Fave the Site

Bobby Revell - Fave the Site

Wonder Woman - Fave the Site

Steve Olson – Fave the Site
BlogoSquare – Fave the Site
Dosh Dosh - Fave the Site
Nate Whitehill - Fave the Site
Ms. Danielle - Fave the Site
Jeff Kee - Fave the Site
Scribble on the Wall - Fave the Site
Jimi Morrisons Head - Fave the Site
Jon Lee - Fave the Site
SiteLogic - Fave the Site
Julies Journal - Fave the Site
Tea & Slippers - Fave the Site
Pencil Thin - Fave the Site
Garry Conn - Fave the Site
Stephen Fung - Fave the Site
eWritings - Fave the Site
Mommy’s Getaway - Fave the Site
GR8 Egypt - Fave the Site
Divya Uttam - Fave the Site
Sean Dinner - Fave the Site
O Salepito - Fave the Site
Kyle Beabo - Fave the Site

Six Degrees of Inspiration - Fave the Site
Randa Clay Design - Fave the Site
Failure is the key to success - Fave the Site

Tech Bold - Fave the Site**

* - Train Engineer
** - Last Wagon
***End Copying Here***

In Bad Faith

2007-07-17T14:10:00.000+04:00

Yesterday in our negotiation skills class we had an assignment, which was the basis of yet another life truth laid out so glaringly obvious.

The class was split into 10 groups, five of which represented the 'management' and the other five the 'Workers'. Each group was paired against another, management negotitaing with the workers. The problem was that the management had changed the shift hour pattern so instead of 12 hours per day for 3.5 days now they'd have to work 8 hours but for 5.5 days, [lessening the hours per day but increasing the days] and this was not acceptable to them. If the negotiations were not successful either the workers would call a strike or the management would declare a lockout. So we had to negotiate with workers and trade concessions and reach an agreement that was acceptable for both

As management, we came up with great incentives, we offered them transport, we offered to split 10% of the profits if the productivity increased by 30%, we even offered to change the shift time so that work would start at 6 am and end by 2pm, leaving them ample time to spend with their families as this was one of the concerns raised, that is, working 2 extra days they would have less time with family .

To cut a long story short, although the other group did not have any legs to stand on or any rational reason to refuse they took issue at some remark one of the 'management' made which they thought was personal and they refused the deal and raised banners [which they had brought from home] that they were quitting.

When I saw the banners, I realized that they had decided this outcome from before, so no matter what we would have offered their answer would be the same. I even asked one the girls from the other group after class and she confirmed my doubt.

Anyway to finally come to the point of this post - sometimes in life it's not about what we did or didn't do, or what we could have done better in any situation, its about the other person. When they have decided the outcome from before, even if we bring manna from heavens they will say no, at the same time they'll try to make us feel that it's our fault that if we had done more, things would be different. We sometimes feel so bad and think about all the things that are wrong with us and what we could have done to change some situation, when really it's not about what's lacking in us at all.

If the other person starts in bad faith it is not about what we could have done more or less it's about them having decided what they would do from before.

Shhhh!

2007-07-14T22:42:00.000+04:00

I was reading this beautiful piece of fiction over at Paisley's in which the protagonist was called Silence and I got to thinking about silence and how scared we are of it - how deafening it can be, if we don't know how to recognize its quiet beauty.

We are so used to noise that silence has started to mean that you don't have anything valuable to say. People feel the need to fill the gap, and if someone becomes quiet while talking to us we become nervous and start filling the blanks with jargon. I've noticed, especially in a group, that if everyone suddenly becomes quiet someone will always begin talking, even if it has nothing to do with the conversation. In fact in our hurry to fill the silence we start thinking of topics beforehand in our head so that we'll have a fallback plan if the situation comes to that.

We feel that until we call attention to ourselves through our words, we won't have a chance to be noticed or a chance to contribute. This happens the most in interpersonal relationships, with your husband or friend or partner. If they unburden themselves to you and tell you of some problem they might be having, you immediately start thinking of the solution you need to offer and imparting your advice - when maybe sometimes all they really want you to do is listen. To be able to have something to 'insightful' to say, sometimes we forget to even listen.

And this extends to inner silence as well, we are afraid that if we let our mind achieve stillness, we'll be forced to look into issues that we don't want to deal with. So we fill our head with million thoughts, they continually chase each other resulting in a cacophony of sound - we forget that a symphony needs rest, patches of silence to accentuate the notes in between to elevate them... to let them shine.

The simple fact is that silence troubles us and we don't know how to deal with it [me being one such person]

When strangely enough, it is actually the testament to the strongest of relationships. If you can share silence with someone it means you are so close that you don't words to bridge the distance!

Oh Stewie - You Machievelli you

2007-07-14T02:26:00.000+04:00

Did I mention how much I love Stewie Griffin who due to his great training and the 'peerless intrepidity' developed at testicular bootcamp won the race to the 'ovarian bastille' but found too late that it was a trap.

So he plans world domination.. stuck in a family that he wants to annihilate.

The cutest thing is that your ignorant family hears you but I don't think they understand your evil genius....but oh stewie I understand you

... you rock!!!

"The more I resist the more intriguing they become, I can't look away... yes, yes again, again" - Stewie in spite of himself, attracted to Teletubies and hating himself for it...

'Omnipotence... gotta get me some of that'.....indeed

PS: When the world is yours will my death be 'quick and painless'?

Fun Posts by Friends: Thursday Thirteen... Attempt 6

2007-07-12T23:59:00.000+04:00

Thirteen Fun Posts [June]

I missed some posts in June as I was with dad, anyway for this post I thought I'd go over June archives - and chose these posts by friends on my blogroll!
[... in random order]

1. Thing-a-fy by Paisley
I can’t say i really ever expected that perhaps the most profound statement i have ever heard would come out of the unsuspecting mouth of my boss, while we engaged in ordinary conversation yesterday at work… read more

2. My Grandmother's Home by Michelle [Komabi + Crow's Feet]
All my childhood lies in my grandmother's house. No matter where I am or what I remember, my mind takes me back to that house. It was, as I have said, the centre of the wheel for our entire ... read more

3. Choosing to Write Changes Everything by Greg [Greg's Writing Blog]
You choose to write today and it's exciting. You'll be rich and famous in a year, maybe two. And it's not so much about the money because you have something important to say and you love words and everyone tells you how great you write...read more

4. Tug of War by Adam [old things under the sun]
What a funny name. It could be a hand-job that you get when you are on R&R, or that feeling that young people get when they think about joining the Army. Of course the other tug-of-war...read more

5. Speaking in tongues the one and only Domestic Minx
You have no doubt gleaned from these rather rude and rampant pages, dear reader, that my tongue has oft been tied when it comes to saying no to the demon drink... read more

6. The Hair-Removal Exercise by The Real Mother Hen
I went to bed at 7pm last night because I had a stinking headache. This morning I woke up at 7am and had an awful backache...read more

7. The Open Paths of The Sky by Mark [tobeme]
Yesterday when the captain of the plane announced to please fasten our seat belts for we were about to make our decent into the airport in Minneapolis/St Paul, I put my book down and peered out the window...read more

8. The Outsider by Meleah Rebeccah
5 years ago, at the age of 27, I made the decision to undergo a complete change. I went from ‘bartending’ (amongst other things) and working nights in a smoke...read more

9. Roaming in Rome by Blurting
I’ve learned so much through my travels but there is one lesson that I will never forget.
Two years ago, I stepped out of the train station in Rome and started walking down one of the many lanes...read more

10. Good Things by HollyGL
I used to visit my "Grammy" in Kansas every summer when I was a kid. I would fly from Florida to Amarillo, TX and Grammy would be there to... read more

11. The Dandelion Tree... The Prologue
The sun exposed the beach in its glare. Holidaymakers mixed with locals, flesh tanned, children played, waves swam away as the tide receded. With worries left in cars reaching boiling point, carefree days rolled over the cliffs to give a lightness...read more

12. Politically Incorrect by TwistedSister... totally pissed off!
I grew up in a home with a developmentally delayed, epileptic sister. One word that was absolutely taboo at our house was "retarded." It was as bad or worse than any curse word to my parents and it was not to be tolerated. Our parents taught us...read more

13. A study in blog types by Bobby
I was enjoying another evening of blogger watching and accidentally read one which is bad luck on Fridays (21 years of bad luck). I was overtaken by a psychic vision - I can’t predict when my ability to see beyond ... read more

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

...

2007-07-11T01:50:00.000+04:00

Black doesn't reflect light
and white..
white reflects all colours
But when you generate both on a computer screen
black and white are exactly the same color
...one is just brighter than the other.

Nursery Rhymes - Simply Child's Play?

2007-07-09T15:47:00.000+04:00

The other day I had gone to spend the day at a friend's and was playing with her one and half year old son who is truly adorable and we were singing all these old nursery rhymes and having a merry old time.

Most of us have grown up with nursery rhymes, such as Jack and Jill, Humpty Dumpty, Georgie Peorgie or Baa Baa Black Sheep, and all the others. Although singing with kids we add effects and movements to make them cute and fun, most of these rhymes have historical connotations behind them some of which are downright sinister.

We still recite these stories without knowing the colorful history or gossip behind them as these rumors and stories do not affect us. The story may have disappeared but the music is still repeated each time we sing along with kids. So I thought why not create a post and try to re-create the past hidden in these inconspicuous sounding rhymes. So I did a bit of research and compiled a few nursery rhymes and the meanings that were supposed to be behind them.

Most of the popular ones came from British politics, in fact they were invented as a way of spreading gossip about royalty. Almost every nursery rhyme has a story behind it. Baa Baa Black Sheep was about taxation, The Old Woman Who Lived In a Shoe was referring to the British Empire trying to control its colonies.

Ring around the rosies,
Pocket full of posies,
Ashes, ashes
We all fall down.

This one is the one I called sinister, its about the black plague- the symptom of which included circles around the eyes (ring around the rosies), and coughing up dried blood from the lungs, resembling ashes. The pocket full of posies was a medieval belief that posies held some curative measures against the plague, so carrying around that flower would keep you safe. Finally, the last line spells out the unavoidable ending to the story, of everyone falling down, dead.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again!

Humpty Dumpty was a powerful cannon during the English Civil War (1642-49). It was mounted on top of the St. Mary's at the Wall Church in Colchester defending the city against siege in the summer of 1648. (Although Colchester was a Parliamentarian stronghold, it was captured by the Royalists who held it for 11 weeks.) The church tower was hit by the enemy and the top of the tower was blown off, sending "Humpty" tumbling to the ground. Naturally the King's men* tried to mend him but in vain. * The "men" would have been infantry, and "horses" the cavalry troops.
- From the East Anglia Tourist Board in England

Georgie Porgie pudding and pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry
When the boys came out to play,
Georgie Porgie ran away.

Naughty "Georgie Porgie"of the Stuart era!
The origins of the lyrics to "Georgie Porgie" are English and refer to the courtier George Villiers, 1st duke of Duke of Buckingham (1592–1628). King James I took Villiers as his lover and nicknamed him "Steenie" (a reference to St. Stephen whom in the Bible describes as having the "face of an angel"). Villier's good looks also appealed to the ladies and his highly suspect morals were much in question!

Affair with the married lady - the Queen of France!
Villiers most notorious affair was with his liaison with Anne of Austria, (1601–1666) who was the Queen of France and married to the French King Louis XIII badly injured both of their reputations. This, however, was overlooked due to his great friendship with the English King, James I (1586 - 1625). He was disliked by both courtiers and commoners, not least for helping to arrange the marriage of King James' son to the French Catholic princess Henrietta Maria (1609-1669) - he later became King Charles I (1600-1649).

George Villiers ( Georgie Porgie )exercised great influence over the King who allowed him many liberties. Villiers private liaisons and political scheming were questioned and Parliament who finally lost patience and stopped the King intervening on behalf of "Georgie Porgie". The romantic elements of of George Villiers and Anne of Austria are featured in the novel 'The Three Musketeers' by Alexander Dumas.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water
Jack fell down and broke his crown
And Jill came tumbling after

A picture of a French Revolution execution Scene during the Reign of Terror

The roots of the story, or poem, of Jack and Jill are in France. Jack and Jill referred to are said to be King Louis XVI - Jack -who was beheaded (lost his crown) followed by his Queen Marie Antoinette - Jill - (who came tumbling after). The words and lyrics to the Jack and Jill poem were made more acceptable as a story for children by providing a happy ending! The actual beheadings occurred in during the Reign of Terror in 1793. The first publication date for the lyrics of Jack and Jill rhyme is 1795 - which ties-in with the history and origins.

Rock-a-bye-baby On the treetop
When the wind blows,
The cradle will rock.
When the bough breaks,
The cradle will fall
And down will come baby
Cradle and all

The author of this well-loved lullaby was reportedly a pilgrim who sailed on the Mayflower. The Wampanoag Indians, who befriended the colonists, carried their infants in cradleboards on their backs. In temperate weather, they suspended the cradles from tree limbs so that passing breezes could rock the babies while their mothers tended the maize and beans. With typical motherly indulgence, the cradles were decorated with shells, beads and porcupine quills. For sober-minded puritans, the sight of a birch tree festooned with such cradles must have been very memorable indeed.

Mary Mary quite contrary,
How does your garden grow?
With silver bells and cockle shells
And pretty maids all in a row.

The Mary alluded to in this traditional English nursery rhyme is reputed to be Mary Tudor, or Bloody Mary, who was the daughter of King Henry VIII. Queen Mary was a staunch Catholic and the garden referred to is an allusion to graveyards which were increasing in size with those who dared to continue to adhere to the Protestant faith - Protestant martyrs.

Instruments of Torture!
The silver bells and cockle shells referred to in the Nursery Rhyme were colloquialisms for instruments of torture. The 'silver bells' were thumbscrews which crushed the thumb between two hard surfaces by the tightening of a screw. The 'cockleshells' were believed to be instruments of torture which were attached to the genitals!

The " Maids" or Maiden was the original guillotine!
The 'maids' were a device to behead people called the Maiden. Beheading a victim was fraught with problems. It could take up to 11 blows to actually sever the head, the victim often resisted and had to be chased around the scaffold. Margaret Pole (1473 - 1541), Countess of Salisbury did not go willingly to her death and had to be chased and hacked at by the Executioner. These problems led to the invention of a mechanical instrument (now known as the guillotine) called the Maiden - shortened to Maids in the Mary Mary Nursery Rhyme.

This drawing was created by the talented Scottish artist Shona Penny - was inspired by the origins of the 'Mary, Mary Quite Contrary' Nursery Rhyme.

Goosey Goosey Gander where shall I wander,
Upstairs, downstairs and in my lady's chamber
There I met an old man who wouldn't say his prayers,
I took him by the left leg and threw him down the stairs.

Goosey, Goosey Gander is a Rhyme with Historical undertones - an attention grabber for a nursery rhyme which uses alliteration in the lyrics designed to intrigue any child. The 'lady's chamber' was a room that once upon a time a high born lady would have her own chamber, (also referred to as a solar). The origins of the nursery rhyme are believed to date back to the 16th century and refer to necessity for Catholic priests to hide in 'Priest Holes' ( very small secret rooms once found in many great houses in England) to avoid persecution from zealous Protestants who were totally against the old Catholic religion. If caught both the priest and members of any family found harbouring them were executed. The moral in Goosey Goosey Gander's lyrics imply that something unpleasant would surely happen to anyone failing to say their prayers correctly - meaning the Protestant Prayers, said in English as opposed to Catholic prayers which were said in Latin!

ALTERNATE VERSION: The rhyme possibly could also refer to Oliver Cromwell and his Roundheads. The first line is a reference to "goose-stepping" Roundheads who would search houses for Royalists. Anyone who refused to accept Puritan ways was arrested and thrown in jail.

There are many who will possibly have different interpretations to each and some who will even refute that this is actually what they mean, but still it's fun to read the stories and rumours circulating behind some of our favorite memories of oft-repeated rhymes from our childhood which we undoubtedly want to pass on to our kids.

I Think! Therefore I Make Myself Unhappy!

2007-07-08T16:15:00.001+04:00

'Thoughts are natural. They can not be stopped, they can however be made sublime with counter thoughts. Just like a thorn can be removed with another and poison neutralized by poison, so can the mind be made sublime with counter thoughts. Inauspicious thoughts should be countered with auspicious thoughts. A state of thoughtlessness comes with long and intense meditation'

- Acharya Mahprajna

Sometimes our life moves in circles - a little while back in conversation with a friend I said that when Descartes said 'I think therefore I am', he must have been crazy because its possible to exist without thinking, and have a happier existence as we make ourselves miserable with the thoughts swarming around. To which he replied if what I wanted, was to be stupid.... to which I had no answer.

A couple of days later I find these lines in one of my really old books. Myself and three of my girlfriends had gone to Nepal few years ago [what a blast]. On one of our less adventurous days [para-gliding, white water rafting and that flight into the Everest in a tiny plane that crashes more often than not made up three of our 6 days] we had gone to this one shop that had the most beautiful pashmina shawls and the owners were Jain and they gave all of us this book by Acharya Mahaprajna called 'Thoughts at Sunrise'.

Anyway to cut a long story short, reading this passage made me realize that although Descartes was right in what he said ...I wasn't altogether too wrong either! Of course if we didn't think we'd be no better than animals [although sometimes I feel it's debatable if we are] and that of course the unexamined life would really not be worth living, and boring in the extreme, but we do train our minds to think more unproductive thoughts than constructive ones!

Sometimes the wrong kind of thinking leads to all sorts of misery, convinces you that you are worthless. We create prisons for ourselves - if everything is going perfect we wait for the bad to happen. If we get a compliment we immediately think that we don't deserve it. We think that everyone who thinks we are smart has been sadly mistaken and we are actually not intelligent at all. Our insecurities keep us from trusting people and sometimes our own happiness.

It's like we feel that we don't deserve to be happy so whenever we are, we unconsciously thwart any chance of success. Maybe its self-preservation, throw something away before it gets taken away. I don't know. But we mutilate ourselves mentally and emotionally with our thoughts everyday.

If indeed we could find a way to separate the bad ones from the good and simply throw away the negative scary ones we'd be happier. A state where we can consciously stop ourselves from thinking - have that kind of control that we can switch on and off - wow!

P.S.: I can't meditate for 5 secs before an unwelcome storm of thoughts, just assails me, ranging from the truly horrible ones to mundane ones where I finally remember where I put the stapler I have been looking for....

Muahhh....to all

2007-07-08T00:01:00.000+04:00

It's that season again - the award season. There is nothing like getting one...you feel so special and it's even better when you receive it from your friends - there's no feeling like it.
Especially when someone like me who thinks of themselves as a bit socially 'challenged' gets the schmoozer award. I have actually been showing off my awards to my non-blogging friends. [Sometimes I can be such a show-off and a bit sad;)]

I am seriously deciding to live most of my life through the net.. I do so much better on it!!!

So thank you confessing7girl, Hollygl and Blur ting... I am now going to try this schmoozing factor on more people I meet...

Here are the rules:
1. If, and only if, you get the Thinking Blogger Award or The Power of Schmooze Award, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think, or have schmoozed you into submission.
2. Link to this post and Mike so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme,
3. Optional: Proudly display the ‘Thinking Blogger Award’ with a link to the post that you wrote (here is an alternative silver version if gold doesn’t fit your blog).

5 of the Best Schmoozers there are:
I think schmoozer in this context would be someone who always makes an effort to connect to you. I wish I could have added a few more...

1. Quasar9
I have said this once before - his comments always leave me smiling, they are so original and so much fun

2. Josie Two Shoes
I recently came across her blog and am so glad to have met her - she too always says hi

3. Peter Haslem: Not only does he comment on other people's bogs he makes it a point to answer each comment on his own blog

4. Titania Starlight
Who's blog is really cute with amazing giffs and she herself is a very 'enchanting' lady

5. Insanity suits-me
A insanely funny blog and they too always leave great comments

and I know it's breaking the rules [as I must restrict it to 5 but rules are made to be broken right?] so I must add Zakman for he too is the ultimate schmoozer

Most of my other social schmoozers have already received this award. Kisses to you all!!!

Mariuca who has two fantastic blogs, the Mariuca's Perfume Gallery and Mariuca - wishing on a falling star and herself is such a rocking chick; and the cutest and sweetest of bloggers has given me a rocking chick award which I must confess I would glance lovingly at on other rocking bloggers sites!
So a big thank you.

I am going to give this award to a few other absolutely fabulous women I have met on the blogosphere...Paisley, Mariuca and Adria have already won... so

The Real Mother Hen
Blur Ting
HollyGL
Meleah Rebeccah
Wonder
Michelle

.... you truly rock!!!!

An Observation - take it at face value!!!

2007-07-07T13:54:00.000+04:00

So much of our life's lived on the net not only with friends we haven't met but also with our other friends... with a phenomenon called Facebook.

I've met my really old friends who I hadn't seen for ages, my work friends from way back when... best friends who live in various cities, friends of friends I might have partied with, random people met once or twice in life...

What's scary is that sometimes people seem more fun from behind a screen, they are easier to deal with, a fewer conflicts arise, we have the capability to use the delete button [unfortunately the 'edit' facility is sometimes lost when we are face to face ;)].

Although people find ways to create conflict and fight on Facebook as well it's far more subtle and long drawn.... and sometimes enjoyable to watch a fascinating treat for the voyeur lurking in all of us.

Very soon I feel all life will be lived sitting in front of a computer.

Bizarro me

2007-07-05T18:30:00.000+04:00

So I got back... and of course I checked out all my favorite blogs... and one comment I made on one of Greg's posts spewed this post into existence.

How much fun would it be if we had a Bizarro version of ourselves.. someone living a life alternate to ours yet a part of ours... sort of a crazy version of us who gets past all the super ego barriers, who knows no limitations of time and space and does everything we want
... we experience what our Bizarro self does yet we are not accountable for it...

... again.. how much fun would that be????

My Sabbatical

2007-06-29T04:38:00.000+04:00

...have exams going on.....and some other stuff I need to deal with .... so will take your leave for a couple of days.
In this sea of people with such beautiful voices... wonder if you will even realize or miss me when I'm gone..... although I so wish you would.......

...the problem with remembering

2007-06-28T15:49:00.000+04:00

Have you met people who after the end of an argument or fight somehow convince you that it was actually you that was in the wrong. They leave you doubting the entire event and how it unfolded. You look at them and you can see that it's not an act and this is how they remember it and you end up doubting the veracity of your own memory...

Memory plays such a huge role in our lives in what we feel about people, in how we react to situations, in our decisions. In fact memory is what decides the entire course of our lives. We put so much stock in what we 'remember' but what proof do we have that what we remember of the past is really all that correct???

When we remember it’s not happening in real time, there is no direct sensory information that we are processing so it's different from perception, and we are not inventing so it’s not imagination because what we remember presumably did take place at some time....

The scary part is that memory is something that has such a capacity to be inherently faulty... because it is always something that happens in the past. After all... aren’t we actually bending time, sort of time traveling when we remember – going back and recollecting. What is to say that everything we bring back is just how it happened? What is there to say that our emotions have not added to our memory what might not have been there before? As proved by the phrase, 'absence makes the heart fonder', and as experienced by couples who have broken up and after some time seem to forget how bad it really was and so get back together...only to realize how wrong they had been... and it really was worse!!!

When we remember ‘how bad’ it hurt we are not remembering the actual pain what we are remembering is actually thinking how bad it hurt. And I know this because just a month after I had moved here I got hit by a car while crossing the road and broke 5 of my bones. I ‘remember’ how agonizing and unending the pain was but do I actually remember it? I mean I can recollect the horror and the essence of the experience but not the sensations.

Thank God for that!!!!

When we meet someone who has injured us in some way and they act as if it never happened, what if they actually did forget about it and indeed it didn't happen at least for them. I know many narcissistic personalities, who only remember the wrong done to them but never what they have done and when you hear them describe some account of a grievance you’re blown away by how sincere and truthful they appear… how totally they believe in everything they are saying, when you know for sure that was not how it happened. I know that at times during such confrontations I’ve been so bewildered that I actually questioned the validity of my memory…perhaps it was me who was the wrong one...

John Locke actually bases our entire sense of self and identity on the continuity of memory. According to him a person who remembers nothing of his or her past literally has no identity!!

... the problem with 'remembering' is best described in the following line....

"The palest ink is better than the best memory"
- Chinese Proverb

Words of Wisdom

2007-06-27T23:38:00.000+04:00

Do you want to write? If you do, then establish oneness with the meaning of meanings. Do not get entangled with words alone. Word is only the medium. What you want to convey is its meaning. The smallest speck of meaning has the capacity to condense a sea of words. It is the power of meaning that has created words. Remember this truth and your writing will automatically become meaningful
- Acharya Mahaprajna

But what am I to do... its so easy for me to get seduced by the heady arrangements of words and the music they make. Whether they are meaningful or not, sincere or not, true or not as long as they are musical....
... the written word, my most exquisite weakness....

Girl's Night Out

2007-06-26T19:45:00.000+04:00

Just got home from a girls night out to this really cool place - [I'm taking steps to be more socially how shall I put it? yes more socially 'accomplished']

Some of the people I met tonight were totally new and random.... and some who I am very good friends with! So two divergent sets...
So it was really a test of how much I had learnt as the result of the previous post and your comments.

So to begin with I had a small talk with myself wherein I told myself I was going to be confident and no one was going intimidate me...

And lo and behold I had such a rocking time.

Before I went out, I read and re-read all your comments and suggestions - and thought I'd conduct an experiment on myself...and report to you all the success or failure of this experiment.

Felt a bit weird to be the subject of your own experiment... but cool

But I rocked tonight... it was bloody amazing and exhilarating. Girl's night out is so much fun!!!!!!!

... another realization I got was that it would be so cool if we could be in the state of mind that we are in when we are slightly inebriated...normally as well... without being drunk..

We'd be so much easier with ourselves and we wouldn't be second guessing everything and examining all of our actions with a bloody magnifying glass of introspect.

Just be...people... just be...

I think I think tooooo much!!!!!!!!!!

There's someone in my head - but it's not me... not always

2007-06-25T14:00:00.000+04:00

Have you noticed that with different people we behave differently???

With some it's so easy to express ourselves and around others we feel nervous or inadequate or just unable to connect. Around some people we are sparkling and talkative whereas in the presence of some we are quiet, unassuming and boring!!!

Sometimes we act so strange that we don't even recognize ourselves.

With certain people we are suddenly on the defensive imagining slights that may or may not have been intended... with some we feel gauche or clumsy when we compare their elegance to ours. With those we perceive to be 'superior' to us we feel overshadowed. Sometimes even with the same person we are different...

Does this mean that we have no set behavior pattern or character? Or does it mean that we have a dozen people living in our head and they take turns to appear?

Is it something to do with the other person's emotional status and mood that we absorb and then tailor our behavior accordingly or is it something to do with how we are feeling about ourselves? Or is it a combination of both?

Do we intuitively believe that what we are feeling, what are perceptions and conclusions are MUST be what the other person is thinking of us and so we go on to defense mode whether that person is indeed feeling that or not...

I think when we meet someone that we perceive is better than us in anyway we immediately reach the conclusion that person too will be feeling superior to us, which in turn drives our behavior.

I know I can't make a sweeping generalization and include everyone...not all people are like that, my husband certainly isn't but I know hundreds who are... me included!!!

My Interview with Bobby...

2007-06-23T03:20:00.000+04:00

When Bobby asked me to give an interview for his wonderful blog with a one-of-its-kind concept - Woman: God's Masterpieces, a blog which has as its central theme, 'incredible woman and why we adore them- with poetry, support, pictures, prose, and praise by Robert Revell and John Justice (with guest editorials too)I was unbelievably flattered and nervous at the same time... since before me he had interviewed two very talented bloggers, Maruica and Adria of In Cinq.

The interview is up on his site now and it was such a thrilling experience... it mattered more than any other interview I had given before because this one is for you all, who know me without ever having met me... which makes it so much more meaningful.

So I hope you check it out and enjoy the interview....

I want to thank Bobby again for his amazingly kind words that made me feel so special.... and I look forward to reading his next interview through which I'll get to know one of you better...

P.S.: It's spectacular to have a place dedicated to women!!!

Dubai Summer Surprises...

2007-06-23T00:27:00.001+04:00

People in Dubai love shopping... there are so many malls... and each and every one of them is bursting at the seams with people. Now that the Summer Surprises has started, entire Dubai will become one massive shopping mall. Dubai Summer Surprises is the way Dubai blackmails people into forgetting about the blistering heat with fabulous sales and different weekly themes for kids ranging from color surprises, knowledge surprises, heritage surprises to sweets surprises a whole gamut of stuff geared to entertaining kids, these activities happen mainly in malls. And of course there is Modhesh Fun City

They build an entire city called Modhesh Fun City, 30,000 sq mts facility offering a world of entertainment, an indoor destination, they have an entire amusement park inside the Airport Expo. Divided into over 20 different zones, the Fun City caters to a wide spectrum of interests. It offers a number of new zones this year such as the Ice Arena, Story Teller Zone, Library and Pet Zone besides the regular ones from the past. Toddlers Zone, Tech Zone, Balloon Art Zone, Arts and Crafts Zone, Fun fair areas, Humtaro and Fulla play houses are just some of the delights awaiting kids.

The East Hall of the Fun City is the hub of major events to be held at the Fun City throughout this season. Besides it also features the Family Court with a Modhesh Restaurant, Inflatable Zone, Sand Zone, Ice Arena, Story Teller Zone, Snack Kiosk, Sports Zone, Fun Fair and an information booth. The Ice Arena has a small skating rink and ice field for the visitors. The West Hall which hosts the Pet Zone and Animal Zone also has Redemption Zone, Family Court and yet another Modhesh Restaurant, RTA Zone, Animal Zone, Think and Play Zone, Snack Kiosk, Youla, Heritage Zone, Fun Fair for Kids and an Information booth.

Additionally, the Surprises brings together world-renowned music shows, art exhibitions, and folk dances plus a huge number of promotions - purchase-related raffles where you can win BMWs, and numerous other scratch ‘n’ win promotions. Besides this there will 8 in-mall events, Spa packages for visitors, attractions like “Cartoonival” and “Hello Kitty” mega shows, in addition to the Wonderful Circus which features highly acclaimed performances reflecting elements of dance, pantomime and theatre, other attractions include classical and Jazz music concerts from around the world for the die-hard music aficionados.

The Ten Surprises are one of the biggest attractions and the highlights of the festival. Unlike the previous editions where each Surprise lasted a week, DSS 2007 will have all the Surprises run through till August 31 – a full 72 days of non-stop excitement and entertainment for the whole family. There's a new inclusion this year for those who love to laugh. Comedy Surprises will showcase the best of humour and laughter for ten weeks continuous. The other exciting Surprises are: Art, Food, Flower, Heritage, Global, Nature, Cartoon, Adventure, and Knowledge, in addition to Comedy Surprises. Dubai''''s modern and expansive malls, under the Dubai Shopping Malls Group (DSMG), will host the Ten Surprises on a rotational basis, making the whole event easily accessible to all DSS visitors this year.

Normally sumer was the one time that people living in Dubai were happy as most would go away for vacations and the terrible traffic would ease but with the success of DSS - no such luck according to a press release, this year being the 10th anniversary promises to be one of maddening rush, totally disrupting the life of the people living here who unfortunately are not on summer vacations. Summertime is no longer an outbound season in Dubai, as a large number of visitors pour in for the holiday season which has a gazillion activities and events, shows and shopping bonanzas as part of the Dubai Summer Surprises (DSS).

Since its inception in the year 1998 the DSS has contributed immensely to boosting summer tourism in the UAE. This time round celebrating its 10th anniversary the summer fiesta has lots in store for everyone as it’s expected to surpass all previous records. With so much lined up for the upcoming holiday season airlines are upbeat about the business ahead. As has been the trend Dubai is bracing itself to welcome an influx of tourists from the neighbouring GCC as well as Europe and the Sub-continent to indulge in the summertime celebrations that will hit the city in a few days from now.

Actually it already has... the traffic vouches for it ...ah! well at least the sales will be good

P.S.: The year before last year I had covered each surprise for a television channel, this year I'll cover it for you guys - - as much I can get out in the rush. Will take pictures to show you the insanity that is DSS. The first week event will be Art Surprises to be held at Dubai Festival City. Here's the description from a press release

Arts Surprises: Dubai Festival City
The first week features a painting exhibition showcasing works of mainly local artists in different mediums. The highlight though will be the photography exhibition that will display images of photographers from Iran, India, Lebanon, Kuwait, Romania, Germany, Oman, Poland, Morocco, Egypt, Jordan, and many other countries. Workshops on fashion and jewellery, arts and crafts, and a clay animation workshop will be held everyday during the week. Dubai Festival City will host the Surprise from 5pm to 10pm. A story telling show featuring Jamal Krayyem titled "Suwar" is also being organized for children. A show titled Two Hands Theatre is also being arranged for mall visitors.

If I were a kid, summer here would be like I had been given a free pass to wonderland!

Notes to Remember....

2007-06-22T05:14:00.001+04:00

This was a real fun meme... and I must thank Loz of Sunrays and Saturdays - An Ordinary Life as well as Midlife - A Journey for bringing back such fun memories...

I'm cheating we are supposed to list 5-10 songs but it was getting so difficult that I bend the rules a bit was tempted to list sooo many more.

[in random order]
1. Innocent Man - Billy Joel
This is one of the first songs hubby had given me... it was in a cassette and only this song repeated again and again

2. Summer of ‘69 - Bryan Adam & Boys of Summer by Don Henley
I remember drives with friends... hanging out the car window, driving by the beach and singing these songs at the top of our voices

3. Comfortably Numb - Pink Floyd
Looking back, the angst of those times amuses me - I remember how 'The Wall' use to be my fallback for all the times I was depressed or angry. I'd lock myself in my room and just listen to it and would feel better by the end of it.

4. Whiter Shade of Pale - Procol Harum
There used to be this guy who was in a band and he had a crush on me so would make me really nice tapes and the original version of this song was in one of them

5. Slave To Love/ Jealous Guy - Bryan Ferry
91/2 weeks...and other memories I'd never want to forget...

6. Wicked Game - Chris Isaak
A little high...a little crazy, a little adventurous

7. "Something So Right" (Annie Lennox with Paul Simon)
I have such a vivid memory of this song - we were all at a friends house - I had just met hubby-to-be and this song played. The back story to it is that I used to think that song was about me, and that it described me perfectly [I was such a drama queen].

8. With or Without you:
The first time I broke someone's heart... not a good memory. But love this song

9. Wish You Were Here - Pink Floyd
This song reminds me of the time that I liked someone who was way too older than me and I was too young... but well what are we to do?

10. Then He Kissed Me
We had bought this Karoake thingy at home and a group of friends would get together and make total fools of ourselves

11. Brain Damage - Pink Floyd
Smoke filled room.... a huge screen and lots of people in varying states of inebriation

12. Night Swimming - REM
At the beach at night.... very literal

13. Fragile - Sting
My cousin and I had made this alternative dance for this song for another cousin's wedding or something.

And since I have been tagging people left right and centre, I'll leave this open to choice. If anyone would like to participate that'd be great...

About books: Thursday Thirteen...attempt #5

2007-06-21T21:35:00.000+04:00

Books I have re-read in the last 6 months

These are some of the books in my library that I have recently re-read and thought I'd recommend...I read a lot and I feel about my books, especially the ones I have enjoyed and learned from... like mothers feel about their kids and to choose from amongst them is very tough. So I thought I'd make my job easier and simply narrow the choice to the books I have re-read recently!
This list doesn't imply that the books not listed here are ones I like any less....

1. Mister. God, This is Anna by Fynn
I could never do this book justice with any review that I could ever write... so even though I am contradicting what I've said earlier about choosing favorites... this book is one I love passionately. It's the story of 19-year old "Fynn" who finds Anna, a mischievous yet wise five and a half year old runaway. It's the story of the time he spent with Anna a very personal account of her outpourings on life. I'll just insert an excerpt
EXCERPT: Over the last few months, it had begun to dawn on me that Anna's real concern had very little to do with properties. Properties had the rather stupid habit of waiting upon circumstances. Water was liquid, except that is, if it was ice or steam. Then the properties were different. The properties of dough were different to the properties of dough or bread. It depended on the circumstances of the baking. Not for one moment would Anna have consigned properties to the dustbin. Properties were very useful, but since properties depended on circumstances, the roadway in pursuit of properties was unending. No, the proper thing to pursue was functions. Being outside Mister God and measuring him gave you properties, seemingly an unending list. The particular choice of properties that you made produced that particular kind of religion that you subscribed to. On the other hand, being inside Mister God gave you the function; and then we were all the same: no different churches, no temples, no mosques etc. We were all the same.

2. My Family and other Animals by Gerald Durrell
This is a lovely book that you'll read & re read. It's soaked in the sunshine of Corfu & is a detailed account of the author & his eccentric family, their unusual friends & their hilarious yet endearing experiences on this beautiful Greek island

3. The Life of Pi by Yann Martel
Winner of the Man booker prize this book is the amazing adventure of the son of a zookeeper, stranded in the middle of the pacific in a lifeboat, his only companions a hyena, an orangutan, a wounded zebra, a 450-pound tiger. Storytelling at its very best

4. A Moveable Feast by Ernest Hemingway
I love the way he writes and invites you into his world...making you wish you were part of that magical world, soon disappearing. "This is how Paris was in the early days when we were very poor and very happy," he concludes. I didn't want the book to end as that would mean leaving the world he so beautifully captured within his words

5. The Myth of Sisyphus and other Essays by Albert Camus
Sisyphus was a Greek hero who was punished by the Gods to ceaselessly roll a rock up a slope and just when he had reached the top after hours and hours of labor the rock would slide down. Imagine pushing up a heavy rock knowing that as soon as you got to the top it would roll down and you would have to start pushing it all over again. And you will have to do this over and over. Camus relates this to the struggle we face in life but what makes this struggle different is the hero's total acceptance of his fate, his rebellion of his very fate. The central conclusion is that just because life is meaningless does not mean that it is bad. The collection of stories published as Le Mythe de Sisyphe in 1942 was the second of the absurds.
[From Amazon] "The work has been cited by critics as refined and carefully crafted. The collection stands as more literature than philosophy. Camus spent at least five years writing and editing the work. The polish is clear with the very first sentence: "There is only one really serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide."

6. The Wall & other stories by Sartre
Containing 4 other stories, ‘The Room’, Erostratus’, ‘Intimacy’ and ‘The Childhood of A Leader’, this is another of my books that I rediscover regularly and always take away something different from. Speaking of ‘The Wall’... I love the story because it lays bare how we feel about life - hours before we are about to loose it. It’s so easy to romanticize death but when it’s breathing down your neck… you literally piss in your pants.

7. Blood Sucking Fiends by Christopher Moore
[Review taken from his site] Jody never asked to become a vampire. But when she wakes up under an alley Dumpster with a badly burned arm, an aching neck, superhuman strength, and a distinctly Nosferatuan thirst, she realizes the decision has been made for her. Making the transition from the nine-to-five grind to an eternity of nocturnal prowlings is going to take some doing, however, and that’s where C. Thomas Flood fits in. A would-be Kerouac from Incontinence, Indiana, Tommy (to his friends) is biding his time night clerking and frozen-turkey bowling in a San Francisco Safeway. But all that changes when a beautiful undead redhead walks through the door ... and proceeds to rock Tommy’s life -- and afterlife -- in ways he never imagined possible.

8. The Curious Incident of the Dog at Night-time by Mark Haddon
This amazing debut novel is written from the perspective of an autistic boy trying to find out who killed the neighbor's dog. It takes us into his life & how he processes information & how he sees the world. It’s a journey into the other side.

9. Interpreter of Maladies by Jhumpa Lahiri
Jhumpa Lahiri's extraordinary, Pulitzer Prize-winning debut collection of stories is a bouquet of stories that offers snapshots of life... traveling from India to New England and back again. In these stories she sketches the tumultuous journey and the feeling of displacement and settling into a culture that is so different from yours that it almost feels alien. It's about love and the strength it gives to cross hurdles of nations, cultures, religions, and generations.

10. Like Water For Chocolate by Laura Esquivel
"In a style that is epic in scope yet intensely personal in focus, Laura Esquivel's Like Water For Chocolate tells the story of Tita De La Garza, the youngest daughter in a family living in Mexico at the turn of the twentieth century. Through twelve chapters, each marked as a "monthly installment" and thus labeled with the months of the year, we learn of Tita's struggle to pursue true love and claim her independence. Each installment features a recipe to begin each chapter."

11. Of Human Bondage by Somerset Maugham
I don’t think I’ve read an author who is so eloquent in his simplicity. I love this book because it’s frighteningly real…imagine falling in love with someone who’s flaws you are so clearly aware of and they are flaws that go against the very grain of your personality. This semi-autobiographical novel explores obsession - it’s the story of a crippled doctor's destructive and compulsive passion for a coarse waitress who ridicules him every opportunity she can get. After she finally leaves him, he finds a comfortable love with a novelist. When Mildred returns, will he take her back? What sort of misery and pain await him if he does? Why do humans allow themselves to be bound to another in this way?

12. The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck
This is another of my all-time favorites. I am fascinated by China and its history so love reading about it. I remember when I had first read this book years ago I had said about it…’ a story in every line. And I still stand by that review

13. One Hundred Years Of Solitude
Like the book before I first read this book years ago and fell in love with it…. The imagery in my head was so vivid it was unbelievable. Weirdly enough when I read it again years later I realized how much we let our rationality get in the way of our imagination and somehow loose that picture sharp imagination. Nevertheless it's a book I revisit ever so often.
“One Hundred Years of Solitude chronicles, through the course of a century, life in Macondo and the lives of six Buendia generations-from Jose Arcadio and Ursula, through their son, Colonel Aureliano Buendia (who commands numerous revolutions and fathers eighteen additional Aurelianos), through three additional Jose Arcadios, through Remedios the Beauty and Renata Remedios, to the final Aureliano, child of an incestuous union. As babies are born and the world's "great inventions" are introduced into Macondo, the village grows and becomes more and more subject to the workings of the outside world, to its politics and progress, and to history itself. And the Buendias and their fellow Macondons advance in years, experience, and wealth . . . until madness, corruption, and death enter their homes”

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Had they lived....

2007-06-21T02:53:00.000+04:00

Do you think Romeo and Juliet would have been as immortal in life as they are in death... I mean had they lived and got married and had a little brood, would they be as famous and as oft-quoted as they are now? Would their love story still been called the greatest love story of all time - a perfect ode to love?

Yeah right! Romeo never had to see Juliet first thing in the morning and Juliet never heard Romeo snoring...

Tragedy is what lends so much allure to love stories... allow them to play out and reach their natural life cycle and like everything else they would soon reach the maturity stage... and dying for each other would appear to be slightly foolish... if not downright ridiculous

Love changes...it grows deeper and the thumping heart and jelly knees turns into a different kind of emotion... it becomes real and like everything real it stops being a perfect little fairy tale.

It's more meaningful because it's accepted with all its flaws and imperfections... it turns into acceptance and respect and the desire to make things work even when the going gets a bit rough.

It's a strange kind of friendship...a paradox - someone capable of hurting you worse than anyone ever could...at the same time someone who can make you the happiest you've been...

It's being accepted even after you've made an ass of yourself at times... it's making room for another in your precious space. It's allowing the heart to open up a little more every day to accommodate each others' insecurities and ego, unspoken fears and vanities.

It's doing little things for one another....it's unconsciously turning in the night and feeling thankful for the person next to you... feeling content at knowing there is someone out there who knows you better than you think they know you...

Someone who you may fight with and exchange cruel words with...but someone who is still there in the morning...someone you may walk away mentally from, time to time...but someone you return to each time.

Someone tied to you with the most fragile of bonds....yet often the one most difficult to break...

Did Curiosity Really Kill The Cat?

2007-06-19T15:37:00.001+04:00

I did a post along similar lines some time ago... as long as I can remember there have been questions running around in my head creating havoc. It's like guilt and curiosity are two traits that I have been blessed [?] with, in abundance.

One of my fellow bloggers, paisley whose blogs I enjoy immensely, left me a comment that actually inspired this post... she said I asked too many questions and that I should follow my heart... but sometimes, actually most of the times, my head won't let me. Even if I could fool it and hide for a while it would still win ultimately, and make me question everything that my heart was telling me.

According to Wikipedia my curiosity falls under the umbrella of 'morbid curiosity'

A morbid curiosity is a compulsion, fixed with excitement and fear, to know about macabre topics, such as death and horrible violence. In a milder form, however, this can be understood as a cathartic form of behavior or as something instinctive within humans. According to Aristotle, in his Poetics, we even “enjoy contemplating the most precise images of things whose sight is painful to us”. (This aspect of our nature is often referred to as the 'Car Crash Syndrome' or 'Trainwreck Syndrome', derived from the notorious inability of passersby to ignore such accidents.)

So how do I stop this trainwreck if indeed it is a train wreck....

What should I term this constant love affair with asking questions? curiosity? vanity? indulgence or simply stupidity?

I call it an affair because I love when questions are asked and an answer is given which leads to more questions and more answers... we keep going round and round in circles and that's when you feel most alive and vibrant, your heart thumping... your senses sharp.. adrenaline taking you to another level....

Maybe it's like a high you don't want to end....

You have this relationship with very few people - the one in which all you do is question everything under the sun and debate...and hours melt away like minutes. I have relationships like this with perhaps only three people... the rest are just filled with mundane stuff and inane ramblings about the day-to-day drudgery that life can be at times...

I feel that the minute you stop discovering or asking questions is the minute you start getting old and stop growing.... maybe this is one my fears and so I constantly keep going around my head in circles...

I don't know thats yet another question...

P.S.: No cats were harmed during the writing of this post although Greg did try to kick them... he didn't succeed

8 random facts about me

2007-06-18T21:11:00.000+04:00

Phil tagged me some time ago to disclose 8 random facts about me so doing it now... sorry for taking so long to respond.

Here are the rules:

Players start with 8 random facts about themselves.
Those who are tagged should post these rules and their 8 random facts.
Players should tag 8 other people and notify them that they have been tagged.

1. I keep my money in not only ascending order but also by serial number [totally insane... I know]
2. I had nine cats before I moved here
3. I have done Bungee jumping, sky diving,white water rafting, para gliding... and now want to take a course through which I'll be able to sky dive solo
4. I don't know how to drive and till three years ago I had never operated a washing machine
5. My parents didn't allow me to model but when I got married I started modeling and hosting shows on television even did a couple of plays... don't do any now as too busy studying...
6. I did my first masters in mass communications and now doing an MBA ... I love studying and am a geek
7. I have partied for three days straight and believe we should do EVERYTHING at least once in life
8. When I first met my husband almost 10 years ago, I couldn't stand him.. he thought I was a snob and I thought he was a flirt [after all I was a convent school girl - very proper and sheltered]

The 8 bloggers I tagged [I guess the ones who have already been tagged by someone else and responded don't have to respond and neither is it incumbent upon others tagged by me... feel free to ignore ;)]

...and the award goes to

2007-06-17T12:20:00.000+04:00

Two bloggers, TwistedSister....totally pissed off and Revellian awarded me the Thinking Blogger Award a few weeks ago and recently [today] so did Lozster. I am beyond flattered and a little giddy with delight as all of them have such great blogs themselves.

Sincere apologies for taking so very long to respond but life's been kind of topsy turvey lately... only now returning to equilibrium.

The Five blogs that make me think would be:

1. Greg's Brain and Greg's Writing Blog. His amazing and sometimes cruel intellect and satire always makes me think and question some of my beliefs. I might not agree with all of his views but can always see the logic and sharpness of his arguments. It's truly a mentally stimulating trip every time I visit... one of my blogging pleasures....

2. Old Things Under the Sun
He writes beautifully and his perception and honesty suck in the reader... he is passionate about his beliefs and speaks up for them. A hater of dogmas and 'joiners', I'm sure he attracts many, and so perhaps he won't like being tagged by me... but hey this is about who I think makes me think...

3. Torchwood and Quasar9: I love visiting both these blogs [by the same author] as I always get to learn some new & awesome discovery from the mysteries of rogue black holes to green tea. Plus his comments always make me smile

4. Kombai: This is an enchanting blog filled with nostalgia and a feeling of going home. The authors Premalatha and Michelle pull you into their life with the simple beauty and eloquence of their writing.

Despair and Coffee: Discovered this blog very recently but love its eloquence, perspective and strange melancholy. A curiosity to know and a desire to share - from love to death to God this blog talks about it all....

There were many other bloggers that I admire and regularly visit...but they had very recently received this award...plus I had to choose only five which was not an easy job as I admire so many more...

The rules are
For the record the rules are -

Congratulations, you won a !

Should you choose to participate, please make sure you pass this list of rules to the blogs you are tagging.

The participation rules are simple:

1. If, and only if, you get tagged, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think

2. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme

3. Optional: Proudly display the 'Thinking Blogger Award' with a link to the post that you wrote (here is an alternative silver version if gold doesn't fit your blog).

A random digression

2007-06-16T20:24:00.000+04:00

My mind drifts as I look around the class - the teacher truly uninspiring, I spiral into a mindless boredom - an insane numbing of the mind.
I drift...

...so many faces... so many disguises.
I wonder what they are thinking? what secrets they hide... what joys they await... what pains they endure...
Do we ever really get to know the person next to us? or are they like me?
Forever guarded!

A reality created with great care - never too revealing, never too open... always wanting to appear perfect... not always achieving that.
It would be good to break free and not need anyone's approval

So why do some of us need constant validation? When we know what we are worth why don't we believe?

We all start with the same slate... then why do some people never seem to need anyone's approval, so sure of themselves - not needing anyone.

Is it nature or nurture?
Are we products of where we are born and to whom we are born?
Does life happen to us or do we happen to life?

How do we break free...how do we unlearn?

Can we create a new identity or are the chains of our DNA too strong?

Pain Sucks...

2007-06-14T21:02:00.000+04:00

I know this is no amazing philosophical revelation or new discovery but it's a truth that just is very relevant to me on a personal level these days. Not only is is it painful to see the person you love in an inordinate amount of pain what is more painful and hateful is to see is how that constant physical pain changes [hopefully temporarily] parts of your personality. And I have seen this in my dad... he's become so angry and so hurtful to everyone around... I tell myself it's the intense pain but it still doesn't make it easy to see the aggression...
So what does one do? Stay quiet and hope thats its the pain talking or retaliate?

I think a loss of control is what leads to rage when you find yourself unable to do the simplest things and need assistance... rage builds up. Although one understands all the reasons but when faced with an onslaught of angry words its easy to forget.

Pain is such a leveller as much as death...rich or poor, brilliant or dumb, beautiful or ugly... you can't help but change in response to pain

unless of course you can't feel it... as is the case with CIPA patients... but I'm sure lack of pain would be as debilitating as chronic pain itself....

I'm Back.....

2007-06-08T22:12:00.000+04:00

Hi... everyone. I cannot express how touched I am by all of your prayers and concern. Feel very honoured and loved!

My dad is okay now... but the amount of pain he is in is insane.

It's been a very humbling experience - a real eye-opener.

Will write more once I get back... which is in a couple of days!!!!

Thanks again for caring

A little Prayer

2007-05-26T17:45:00.000+04:00

Hi all... will be be away for a couple of days...Dad's bypass is on the 29th... so going home. He'll be admitted on the 28th - which is his birthday and that really sucks...
Please pray everything goes okay. My dad's someone I have never seen weak.. so this is beyond difficult for me...
At home everyone sees me as the strong one maybe even a little 'cold' but when it comes to dad all defenses are down... and it's terrible...
I have a huge family with lots of aunts and uncles. They all like to bond in times such as this... which is of course really good... but I'm not used to people as I always was a little antisocial, hung out with a select group of friends... so I'm clueless when it comes to interacting with huge groups of relative in times of personal pain... they expect you to share what you are going through with them...and I don't like others to see my tears.....its probably the only time when being with other people is as if not more difficult than being alone
Anyway all that's secondary...as this is not about me... its about dad!!
So please say a little prayer...

Just a little note...

2007-05-25T03:45:00.000+04:00

... sounds sentimental and all... but I'm so glad to have met all of you... the amazing people I've met through blogging... so different from each other yet all so unique... you make my day special, and I learn something new and get re-acquainted with something old...every day

I have a serious problem connecting with people in 'real' life... lots of barriers that I just can't seem to cross to arrive at a natural comfortable point... all of it so forced and artificial.

But here, in this very special universe... making contact with everyone... I'm so much more in my element... away from all physical distractions... a little vulnerable, a little armored...

Enjoying these beautiful random encounters with so many facets of myself and of you....

Silly Jokes: Thursday Thirteen...attempt # 4

2007-05-24T03:40:00.000+04:00

Thirteen of the corniest jokes possible



So I was debating whether I should list 13 of my favourite books or go in a totally opposite direction and list 13 jokes for 6-year olds. And the silly side won...they are childish but make me laugh...highlight to see more clearly...

Warning: The matter below is seriously corny and childish...read at your own peril

1. What did one eye say to the other?
Between you and me, something smells!

2. What did the tie say to the hat?
You go on a head, I will just hang around!

3. What did the ghost say to the invisible man?
Long time no see!

4. What did the doctor say to the man who complained he was shrinking?
You will just have to be a little patient!

5. What did the math book say to the history book?
Boy, do I have problems!

6. What did the cherry tree say to the farmer?
Quit picking on me!

7. Why did Cinderella's coach sit her on the bench
Because she ran away from the ball!

8. When is a car not a car?
When it turns into a driveway!

9. Why did the farmer bury all his money in his fields?
He wanted rich soil

10. What do you get when you cross SpongeBob with Albert Einstein?
SpongeBob Smartypants

11. What did the banana do when it heard the ice scream?
It split

12. Why does Oklahoma need a telescope?
To see what Arkansas!

13. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it was feeling crummy

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
(leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

1. Titania Starlight

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Mirror, Mirror

2007-05-23T16:56:00.000+04:00

I have often wondered if when we see our face in the mirror it is the same face other people see when they look at us. Of course there will be some correspondence or similarity between what I see myself as and the what others see me as...but I wonder how much?

If the phrase 'Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder' is true than I wonder how big the difference would be.

Sometimes when you think you are not exactly looking your best [euphemism for pretty darned awful] you'll end up getting get compliments and think to yourself, 'huh really?' or 'wonder what he/she wants'. And when you think you're looking good someone will ask, 'What's the matter, you look pulled down'. And all you can do is smile inanely...

And not only that, aren't there days when you seem different to even your own self, some days you like what you see in the mirror and then there are days that you want to break the damn mirror...

Of course it's not our face that changes [its a different story if a zit shows up unannounced and unwanted] but our brain/mind whatever the jargon you want to use, tricks us.

And then of course there is the 'why now?' phenomenon... have you noticed how everything looks perfect when you are just about to go to bed.. hair is shiny, skin's glowing ... but fast forward to when you want to dazzle on a special evening... no matter what you do nothing seems to work. Probably that's something to do with expectations... I have found everything in life turns out the most fabulous when your expectations are really low!

I am sure you have said many a times or thought many times that someone thinks they are better looking than they really are..but perhaps they see themselves that way and its not an act.
What if we appeared slightly different to everyone that saw us?

Wouldn't it be fascinating if we could have alternate views of ourselves [without the help of psychogenics ideally] and be able to see what others see when they look at our face?

I really would love to see myself through someone else's eyes...physically. Because the only way we see ourself is through a mirror or a photograph... not the way others see us. Not truthfully! Mirrors can lie and so can photographs!

Actually it's a pretty funny thought that others might have more of an accurate picture of what we look like than we do ourselves... because come to think of it we only see reproductions of our face. Second generation information.

So wouldn't you like to see yourself through someone else's eyes??? Literally!!!

Unfashionably Nice!

2007-05-22T08:10:00.000+04:00

For the life of me I cannot fathom why being nice is so unappreciated and why being rude and sarcastic is thought to be indicative of a sharp mind.

The dictionary defines nice as:
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) -
nice [nahys] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation –adjective, nic·er, nic·est.

Exhibiting courtesy and politeness: a nice gesture.
Of good character and reputation; respectable.
Pleasing; agreeable; delightful: a nice visit.
Amiably pleasant; kind
Refined in manners, language
Virtuous; respectable; decorous

People assume that if you are not being “aggressive” about what you want you are a coward or if someone is rude to you and you don’t reply in kind you’re a wimp.

No one stops to think that maybe you don’t want to stoop to the other person’s level.

I’ve personally had so many experiences whereby when I’m being polite it’s taken as an invitation to sit on my head and dance, or just ignore me until I start to scream and show my nasty side.

I’ve noticed this on message boards, the rude, “sarcastic” are in the foreground of it all and the ones who don't bully or shout are overshadowed.

Like they say ‘nice guys finish last’ but why is that???????

Since when did being nice, being decent, being well-mannered or courteous stop being fashionable and should we stop because it’s not en vogue?

Being nice has nothing to do with how entertaining a person can be but I suppose in today’s world until we insult someone or put them down, we think we can’t be noticed!

P.S.: I realize my English teacher would have butchered me for the over use of the word 'nice' which in her opinion was the most bland word in the English language...

Why Do We Cry in Movies?

2007-05-20T14:44:00.000+04:00

We had gone to watch a movie on Friday with a friend and his family and as always show me a sad scene in a movie and the waterworks start. The strangest thing is that I don’t cry easily regarding personal stuff [I hate anyone seeing me cry, hubby is the only exception]. At the end of the movie he asked me why do we cry at movies. Is it because in daily life we suppress our emotions and they get released like this or is it that there is something in the movie we are identifying with. I was intrigued so I thought I’d do some research on the psychology of crying.

Why do we cry? Here are some things I discovered.

Crying is a complicated process not as easy as the trickle of spontaneity that happens at times. First of all, there are really three different types of tears. Basal tears keep our eyes lubricated constantly. Reflex tears are produced when our eyes get irritated, like with onions or when something gets into our eyes. The third kind of tear is produced when the body reacts emotionally to something, emotional tears. Each type of tear contains different amounts of chemical proteins and hormones.

Scientists have discovered that the emotional tears contain higher levels of manganese and the hormone prolactin, and this contributes in a reduction of both of these in the body; thus helping to keep depression away. Many people have found that crying actually calms them after being upset, and this is in part due to the chemicals and hormones that are released in the tears.

In The Expression of Emotions in Man and Animals, Charles Darwin listed three reasons for the secretion of tears: “The primary function of the secretion of tears, with some mucus, is to lubricate the surface of the eye, and a secondary one, as some believe, is to keep the nostrils damp, so that the inhaled air may be moist, and likewise to favour the power of smelling. But another, and at least equally important function of tears is to wash out particles of dust or other minute objects which may get into the eyes” (Darwin, 1872: 169). In Darwin’s view, the excretion of emotional tears was related to the first function.

The philosopher William James, following Darwin, considered emotions to be little different from reflexes, occurring without prior rational thought. Only after experiencing the bodily sensations of, say, anger or fear, James argued, do we cognitively recognize the emotions.

But this does not explain why the bodily sensations arise in the first place. How does it happen? Why do we start crying? What emotional response triggers it?

An emotional response to stimuli acts as a trigger. These responses could have a lot of sources, pain or loss of a loved one, an internal response that is triggered when we feel hurt, when someone is mean to us or insults us, rage causes tears, feelings of helplessness makes us cry in frustration. When emotions affect us, the nervous system stimulates the cranial nerve, in the brain and this sends signals to the neurotransmitters to the tear glands. And so the first tear trickles down.

There are many culturally acceptable reasons to cry in society. The first accepted reason to cry is probably death. Grieving includes crying and often times it was believed that if someone did not cry, they would suffer physically because they did not release their pain. Experiences in life and love are other reasons society allows us to cry. Women have been allowed to cry more than men traditionally, but the benefits of crying seem to suggest that men need to cry more. Cultures around the world have crying out of obligation, for show, and for grief and pain. Each culture defines where and when it is acceptable to cry. Cultures, in some parts of the world, sometimes determine the length of crying and mourning. For example, in the Zuni culture, a chief allows the mourners of the dead to cry for four days after which the chief says that the death occurred four years ago, and now the mourning may end.

Crying and tears may be favored by natural selection because they bring about helping behavior by the spectator. This helping behavior is explained by the assumption that crying and tears “imitate” some of the perceivable characteristics of a baby that has just been born (e.g., wet face, facial expressions, respiratory sounds). If human parents and people in general are “programmed” by evolution to feel the need to help and protect when they see (and hear) newborns, then when non-neonates are in need, the appearance and the behavior that together show resemblance to the neonate may have survival value at some essential points during phylogeny and, thus, may spread in the human species.

But none of this research still answered my original question – our brain knows when we are watching a movie it is fiction then why do we cry?

Perhaps you can help me answer? Why do we cry at movies?

ADAM, EVE & THEIR BLASTED APPLE

2007-05-18T21:39:00.000+04:00

Intro:
Lately I seem to be surrounded by high relationship dramas of he said, she said. Since these days I’m so obsessed with blogging, I thought why not share my thoughts with you - my whacky theory about Adam, Eve and their blasted apple.

Even people reading this who don’t believe in religion are familiar with Adam and Eve right? so don't go all judgmental but read with a pinch of salt

Prologue
Eve forces Adam out of Heaven…

Story Begins…
He never forgave her for it and neither have the generations of men following. Their collective consciousness, as I like to think of it, still harbors unconscious and for some very conscious resentment of all Eves.

Everything that goes wrong in their life is traced back to a woman, from a crappy boss to a bad job to a miserable life – it is all her fault as after all it was a woman who displaced the prince from the throne

Sometimes I think all this trouble for one measly apple?

But of course it wasn’t really about the apple was it.

Eve didn’t really care about the apple it didn’t matter whether it was sweet or sour and she didn’t particularly want to eat it either. She wanted to see if she could make Adam have it… prove his love so to speak [and so came the snake slithering in…]

The apple was never the issue - the issue was power - hers over him.

Story Continues...
And to this day the same story continues. All relationships are power games, some very subtle and running totally undercover and others not so subtle. There are apples all around disguised in so many shapes and forms, some cajoling, others shoving it down someone’s throat. And the name of the snake in this story is power a.k.a control

In the beginning the power issue is covered by the headiness of new love, couples lost in the hazy glow of love, ecstatic with euphoria, which they insist on sharing with all and sundry in unabashed displays of public affection. So what if 6 months down the road we have our aforementioned friend rear its smooth, round and perfectly delicious head.

Of course any reading this post currently in that particular phase of love will shake their heads disdainfully – but you’ll see what I mean. It happens to everyone even people happily married. Power and its distribution is what makes everything run. The human race is all about 'survive or perish' and to survive we need power – either to relinquish all of it or to wield it.
Not to digress from the topic of relationship [wonder if I ever got there] of men, women and of course apples… basically we repeat and relive the Adam, Eve saga with bizarre twists and storylines

The Adam who likes to think he is in control but isn’t meets the Eve who actually is

In this case our Adam likes to think he has the power and is a forceful, dominating person but actually isn’t. If humans behaved rationally he would be attracted to an Eve who would cajole, feed and flatter him, and make a nice pie out of that apple… he would do anything for her – you could maybe even find him putting the toilet seats down and or helping Eve with household chores. I think I'm getting too fanciful here...
All he needs is a couple of massages, nicely cooked meals not necessarily every day, compliments and to be made to feel like he is indeed the king of the castle.
But of course human nature being perverse there are far more chances that he will be attracted to an altogether different sort of Eve... this one means business. No flattery or massages here.
She won’t let him get away with pretending he is running the show... its equal or nothing. Apple sliced down straight in the middle.
Of course initially poor Adam huffs and puffs trying to bring the house down... he shouts and throws a tantrum she throws a bigger one…

There are other scenarios…
Control Freak Eve and an even more controlling Adam
Passive Aggressive Eve and a slightly dominating Adam [that’s me and hubby]

…. But their tales can wait, for now I’m going to eat my apple!

DISCLAIMER: This article is not meant to offend anyone and if it did it’s all the fault of the apple on my right ;)

Happy Moments: Thursday Thirteen...attempt # 3

2007-05-17T20:50:00.000+04:00

Thirteen Happy Moments had in the past year
[at least the ones I have pictures of]

Have to admit I stole the idea from Empress Bee [please don't have me beheaded.. my only sin was a brain 'less' of ideas]

1. Hubby's Birthday [May 15, 2007]

2. This was a seriously amazing cake & looked beautiful too.. with fruits sprinkled with golden dust
3. Sweets for my sweet

4. My 3 loves

5. Aby & I at his mom's house on our last visit

6. The ultimate thrill of all times...

7. My best friend [at some birthday]

8. Aby & I chillin' [thats the Burj-Al-Arab in the background]

9. At Cirque Du Soliel - they performed in Dubai recently.

10. Posin' away with my uber cool mom-in-law [that was a happy happy day]

11. At a rocking party

12. At 360 [a cool bar on top of a hotels roof]

13. Mall of Emirates [they keep having random stuff - its fun to watch]

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

It's a Wonderful Life: Meme

2007-05-17T20:24:00.000+04:00

I've been tagged by Greg from Greg's Brain and Greg's Writing Blog to list 10 things that make my life wonderful.

This is of course assuming that I find my life wonderful. I like living and all but wonderful is too ambitious a word. I am contented with fun and liveable

10 things that make life... liveable & fun!

1. My husband [He sees me and loves at my best and worst, and the worst is not so pretty]
2. My Cats [I can communicate with them. Truly]
3. Food [second best source of pleasure in life]
4. Reading [ties with food]
5. Getting Compliments [just makes ma day - sounds terribly vain doesn't it?]
6. My computer [takes me to virtually another universe - I absolutely LOVE it]
7. Thinking [Keeps me alive]
8. Arguing [Keeps me stimulated]
9. Not having to worry about making ends meet [Maslow's Hierarchy]
10. Being healthy and blessed [The greatest gift of all]

3 new blog mates I'd like to tag [forgive me if you don't like being tagged and feel free to ignore - no hard feelings!]

1. HollyGL
2. Journal of a Supposedly Tofu Addict
3. Tigergirl [She has the most awesome funky jewelry - do check it out]

All the blogs listed in this post are very well written and a lot of fun to visit!

P.S. I edited the list to add reasons to why these things make my top 10 list, thanks to Greg!

When helmets make no sense

2007-05-16T21:57:00.000+04:00

Got this in my mail thought I'd share!

SERIOUSLY? A helmet to protect your head in case of a fall?